Funny things to say

[HoMiE]

I don't mind any ribbing that goes on just before the beep. Sometimes I have to get out of ready position to stop myself from laughing. I always like to say "Did you seat the mag?" or "Shoot that on the move" to my fellow competitors. Of course I don't joke around with someone I don't know, but I welcome the added joking, helps add a distraction you have to deal with before the buzzer goes off.

[Chris Keen]

When someone asks "Where are my hands on this stage ..... ?"

You can say: "At the end of your arms."

[Chills1994]

Now that's funny ^^^.

I have always been tempted to say "it's a hands on your a$$ start."

I don't mean to be a total stick in the mud with my posts here and I will finally try to clarify what I wrote earlier:

If you're squauded with your "friends" and/or "shooting buddies" and they are deliberately doing or saying things to screw with your mental game as you step up to the line, then maybe they aren't necessarily your "friends".

Catch my drift?

Edited April 23, 2008 by Chills1994

[Chris Keen]

People will actually look at their hands .... if you say that as an RO.

[Chills1994]

L9X25 wrote:

If you can take all of that stess but get unraveled by someone making a "don't mess up" comment just before LAMR, something is wrong with this picture.

Did you hear me say that I unravel?

No.

No, you didn't.

Because I don't.

My point is that it is "unprofessional" and uncalled for, again with the caveat or the asterik * added if meant to be (slightly?)spiteful under the guise of doing it in a jocular manner.

Like I said before it's just me and my OPINION, I think it's rude.

If you knew me, and you said, "don't mess up" as I stepped up to the line and said it in a joking manner with no underlying undertones, I'd actually chuckle about it, and then when I was done shooting, I would be thinking:

"Payback is a mother______"

As I thought about what to do to you to get you back.

Edited April 23, 2008 by Chills1994

[Chris Keen]

Look there's a fine line between being funny "ha ha" & being funny in a mean spirited way, but you usually can tell. If so then they arent your friends. But I know who my friends are, and I welcome their ribbing ...... usually.

[HSMITH]

Keen, sister wasn't on the protected list

After shooting you can ask about the 'warning shots' the other guy was taking at the steel before he decided to shoot it.

I usually shoot with a group of friends and we joke back and forth, if someone else jumps in the middle they are fair game. None of us hassles people who don't participate. To me participation is permission to give it back. I don't think I have ever seen anyone screw around with someone after LAMR intentionally but some of the conversations you can pick up with your muffs on can make you take a minute to get collected and stop laughing so you can shoot. The best classifier I have ever shot was a 3 string deal, between string two and three, after shooting the first two pretty well, Mainus's cell starts ringing in his range bag after I had AYR, nodded and was waiting on the beep. I put my hand on my gun stopping the sequence, turned off what I was doing, thanked him for playing my theme song (some rock song, and it was LOUD LOL) while I shoot, laughed pretty hard, and went back to what I was doing. I smoked the last string. Point of this lame little story is that if you are really concentrating on what YOU need to do the rest doesn't matter. Quiet your mind and it just doesn't matter. People that get worked up about it aren't where they need to be, and use the distraction as an excuse IMO. If someones mental game is so fragile that they can't get it back together after a distraction it isn't my problem, I'd suggest golf with someone other than me because I have fun there too LOL.

[Sparky]

I've been shooting this sport since 1980; heck maybe 1979. This is supposed to be fun and if I couldn't

screw with the shooters; especially the ones I know then I'd be doing something else where I could.

I like what BE said that they use to mess with each other all the time and he's talking about some of

the best shooters in the world. From what I understand TGO is one of the best at messing with other shooters.

Have fun and enjoy this sport and enjoy the people. They are some of the best people in the world.

[Jeff686]

Look there's a fine line between being funny "ha ha" & being funny in a mean spirited way, but you usually can tell. If so then they arent your friends. But I know who my friends are, and I welcome their ribbing ...... usually.

I totally agree! For example:

"Hey Chills! Pull that stick outa your a$$ and have some fun!" would most definately be inappropriate and unwanted. Although I do enjoy joking and having fun at the match, I would never say something so rude and uncivil to a total stranger. It's just not in my nature. Nope. Wouldn't do it. Never....

Not me.

Mama raised me better than that.

Read my lips.

Thousand points of light....

[wooddog]

Shooting and having fun is what its all about for me, and the good natured ribbing at the range and on the line keeps it all in perspective. There are some guys that take it all more serious than most, but so be it, it's still fun to beat them too.

[Mike Dame]

when the shooter has to start facing up range we put our finger tips a few fractions of an inch from their face and say "not touching you" over and over. Yeah It's childish but its also good for a few laughs.

Empty cases inside the mag well, because they fall out unlike the white backing from patches, Matt.

I've found a good collection of rocks inside my range bag at one match.

Having them carry your ammo without out them knowing.

had a bet with a friend of mine on who gets master first and the winner had his bag carried for him for a match, of course my other friends dumped their ammo into my bag.

holding doors shut during walk-throughs

asking if thats really how they are going to shoot the stage?

betting on d's, mike's, and no-shoot's

as long as no one gets hurt and/or nobody's gear gets damaged I'm game.

as for comments, most are spur of the moment things but some good ones are, don't screw this stage up like the last one, you suck go stand over there, interesting but why didn't you shoot it the right way?, you could try starting in the correct position, you sure you know what you're going to do?,

Edited May 13, 2008 by Mike Dame

[kgunz11]

Basically, I can count the number of good friends I have had my entire life on one hand.

Good friend = give the shirt off your back, down in a foxhole kinda thing.

If you know me that well, then you know I don't like joking around and / or grab a$$ing at a match, especially with the underlying ulterior motive of screwing with my/your mind game .

If you don't know me, don't try to small talk me at a match. Don't try to "joke around" with me.

Again, just my opinion, to do so is not respectful, is low, and shows a lack of class.

I dare any of you to walk by the Super Squad this weekend at the Single Stack Nat's and as Todd Jarret or Dave Sevigny is stepping up to the line, yell out:

"You're winning the match!"

Or

"No pressure! Don't screw up!"

I double dawg dare you!

Hmmn... methinks that will go over like a lead balloon.

Mind posting your name so I don't make the mistake? I enjoy having fun with my squad mates. I don't do this stuff for a living, I do it for fun. As long as my squad and I are safe, it's all good. I enjoy the matches I have shot because most everyone has a good personality and they can laugh at themselves. I mean no disrespect, but if I shot with people like you in my first couple of matches I would have quit.

[Resjudicata]

Lighten up Francis.

Yeah, I can't believe nobody threw that quote up before now.

Chris

L9X25 wrote:

If you can take all of that stess but get unraveled by someone making a "don't mess up" comment just before LAMR, something is wrong with this picture.

Did you hear me say that I unravel?

No.

No, you didn't.

Because I don't.

My point is that it is "unprofessional" and uncalled for, again with the caveat or the asterik * added if meant to be (slightly?)spiteful under the guise of doing it in a jocular manner.

Like I said before it's just me and my OPINION, I think it's rude.

If you knew me, and you said, "don't mess up" as I stepped up to the line and said it in a joking manner with no underlying undertones, I'd actually chuckle about it, and then when I was done shooting, I would be thinking:

"Payback is a mother______"

As I thought about what to do to you to get you back.

[Resjudicata]

BTW, I take other shooter's magazines off their belts without them knowing it and try to sell them to the rest of the squad.

I do make sure they have them back well before they are on deck.

Chris

I'm one of those guys who is just too serious when shooting. It's obvious.... but I'm running through the COF in my mind of course etc ...

Now that I'm starting to get better and pushing at my friends scores they are playing mind games getting me laughing.

Now that doesn't bother me although friendly reminders, hexes and jokes especially bring to me need for reciprocity.

Help me out here.

In friendly club shoots of course what are some of your favorite jokes and mind games to break the ice and have a little fun just before they shoot.

Zen jokes would be especially appreciated as they know I'm a Maku-Mozo shooter.

[DocBall]

I shoot better if I'm laughing walking up to the line. it breaks up the stress of needing\ wanting to shoot well. If I really screw up a stage I might walk over away from everyone and talk to myself for a minute or two, but then I'm right back talking and joking. If it wasn't fun I'd find another game to play.

[ede]

if it was all about shooting or winning i'd stay home.

[gunsablazin]

My gang cuts up so much I am amazed no one has shot one of us, I had an SO at a recent match tell the new shooters to watch me shoot because I am am fast and smooth and never make any mistakes, well that is alot to live up to! I have been shooting with that SO"B" for 20 yrs.! All in good fun ofcourse, and only with guys I know well enough to have some fun with. I got a procedural at the state match last fall and the SO who gave me the finger I know pretty well, I told him that he didn't have to be that way about it, he says "You earned that prize", I say "not the penalty its that you look so damn happy about it!" I still give him hell about that damn grin! I have heard my crowd roar with laughter when I hit a non threat etc. I deserve it as I am a known PITA! Yeah, I like to win, and I do every once in a while, but its about having fun to me.

Edited May 14, 2008 by gunsablazin

[Wakal]

BTW, I take other shooter's magazines off their belts without them knowing it and try to sell them to the rest of the squad.

Stress is generated by your reaction to a situation, not by the situation.

Personally, I find thinking about getting shot at (afterwards) a lot more stressful than getting shot at (at the time). Everything else, not so much by comparison. As far as picking on your friends...hell, if it wasn't fun, I wouldn't be shooting. While I have no interest in beating someone because their equipment malfunctioned, I have no problem whuppin' up on a guy because his brain malfunctioned

Alex

Edited May 14, 2008 by Wakal

[Miranda]

"good luck, don't embarrass us."

helps if you keep a straight face....

miranda

[Brian Gonsalves]

I don't have a any great one liners that haven't been shared here already. But, I have been known to call a shooting buddies wife on the way home from the match to let them know their husband wouldn't be in a very good mood when they got home, because I gave him a beating.

You can always tell them your time and score on the stage right before the RO starts the commands, of course shave a good 30 - 40% off your actual time.

One more thing a few years back while watching the Super Squad shoot at the Nationals in Bend, Oregon I was having a conversation with TJ. When Rob came up to shoot, Todd said, "ssssshhhhh! that's Rob Leatham he's The Great One, the best in the world quiet please!" Of course he didn't say it quietly and it got a good laugh!

[HoMiE]

My favorite is after shooter finishes is to ask them their stage time. After they respond, say "Thanks, now I know how long it takes to suck."

[Johann the Horrible]

I still like to lock the odd holster during Level 1`s. The patching tape up the mag opening is also good for a few laughs especially if the starting position is with a clear mag well. A new one for me is to substitute my 45 mag on the belt of a 40 shooter(please do not this the other way round as it can be dangerous) - the mag goes in but the rounds does not feed. It is always good fun to hide a shooters shooting bag- he comes of the line with a hand full of used mags and empty cases and has no place to put it until he finds his bag.

If one of the "pasters" are taking to long you put your hand on the shooters gun and say loudly "STANDBY and let the buzzer go. After the shooter has finished the stage at ULASC you go "IF AND I SAY AGAIN IF you are finished you may unload and show clear"(Obviously this only works if you`re the RO.)

I shoot with the National champ and when he is on the line we sometimes walk onto the stage and start adding extra targets and making if we are moving others around. When he complains we say we are just "leveling the playing field a bit" He also had some steel plates clamped to a rack - it took 5 shots to get them off.

My 14 year old daughter has started doing a half minute "coffee grinder" dancing routine after smoking a stage.- The little routine is growing every Saturday. She now has a small crowd cheering her on. If she seriously fluffs up a stage she will dare the other shooters to try and emulate that.

I had some extra targets added to a shoot that I over planned and walked to many times to the RO`s liking. I once had a shooter trowing a empty mag at a particularly recalcitrant popper - he missed.

Just after we changed to forward falling poppers we had loads of fun with guys trying to shoot them until they fell backwards. Now we still sometimes mix the forward and rearwards falling poppers. - Its is still good fun.

[Punkin Chunker]

BTW, I take other shooter's magazines off their belts without them knowing it and try to sell them to the rest of the squad.

I do make sure they have them back well before they are on deck.

Chris

That's funny -- especially if you can sell them to the person you snaked them from.

Some of the tone of this thread reminds me of Jack Nicholson's line in a movie, when he said, "We're gonna need to drink a LOT to kill that bug up your ass."

So there are some shooters who are 100% "eye of the tiger, don't mess with me" shooters, and there are some who are "be happy, don't worry" right up to the Make Ready command.

Fine. Takes all types. So we don't all wear grey flannel.

I think the eye of the tiger folks really don't need to worry about being the target of unwanted heckling. Your friends know who you are, and the people who don't know you, in this sport, are generally considerate enough not to mess with strangers. So no need for giant plastic bubbles or, "Don't Mess With Me" stickers.

Pasters on your friends' backs is funny. We managed to stick a small paper cut-out no-shoot on one guy's back -- he was SO SLOW pasting we got concerned for his safety!

[ChrisStock]

if it was all about shooting or winning i'd stay home.

Amen to that. It's so true that I kicked off this thread awhile back. Am I trying to get better? Yes. Am I having fun with it? Yes.

I have only been to 2 matches where the fun factor wasn't there, and it was because I was in too much pain and should have stayed home, but the thought of missing the camaraderie made me load up and give it a go. One I walked off of after 3 stages, and the other one (2 weeks ago), I struggled through after working until 3 hours prior to match then trying like hell to just make it through the day. I was definitely one grumpy ass and should have shot the classifier and went home.

On the whole, I like the folks I squad with, and we have a good time between stages. I tend to do much better if I'm not all wound up tight before I get on deck. After LAMR, it's all business until ULSC, then back to laughing (usually).

[ChrisStock]

My favorite is after shooter finishes is to ask them their stage time. After they respond, say "Thanks, now I know how long it takes to suck."

That is as cold as it gets..youch.