Having to give death notifications.

[Alaskapopo]

Recently had to do another one. There is nothing you can say to make everything better when you have to tell someone their child has died.

Go home and hug your kids everyone and tell them you love them.

pat

Edited August 25, 2013 by Alaskapopo

[Sarge]

Tough job indeed. I had to serve as casualty assistance a few times while serving in the senior ranks. Never had to do a notification though. Thank god! The Army just picked guys to do this like it was just another duty.

I don't envy those that do it as part of their regular duties.

[Poppa Bear]

Especially when it involves under age alcohol, or drug use.

[RangerTrace]

It happens all the time for me and unfortunately, I/We have to look for appropriate responses etc. Death has become an unfortunate part of my life for far too long. God Bless You for what you do.

[blaster113]

I hate having to do notifications. If I never have to see another dead body again I'm good till I'm stuck in a box and placed in the ground myself. Helps when you have to do notifications to have a chaplain with you.

[blaster113]

And for those of us who have to deal with death as part of their employment, the absolute worst thing for us to do is to deal with a death case involving a child. The younger the child is the difficulty increases exponentially. There is nothing more tragic and depressing. Go home, hug your children tight, then hug them again. The general public will never, ever, ever understand.

[Round_Gun_Shooter]

Recently had to do another one. There is nothing you can say to make everything better when you have to tell someone their child has died.

Go home and hug your kids everyone and tell them you love them.

pat

That was the part of the job I hated most and could never get used to

[SiG Lady]

They say that's the toughest part of law enforcement's job--the notifications. I've tried to imagine it several times--and I just can't.

I respect anyone who CAN do it gracefully.

[motosapiens]

Thanks to all who this in their work for your compassion and humanity.

[Sparky]

Children should not die before their parents and after doing the job for over 40 years

notifications are the part I miss the least. May God Bless my fellow Brothers and

Sisters in LE and may he give you the words that are most difficult to say.

[Alaskapopo]

I wish we had a chaplain but we are a small department. After I tell them I stay until family or friends arrive to comfort them. When its some ones child its never easy.

Pat

[Sparky]

Pat,

Why don't you contact your local Pastors and ask them if they would help

with the notifications? Most Ministers that I know would help. Might

even get a Chaplain's program started?

Ron

[Alaskapopo]

Pat,

Why don't you contact your local Pastors and ask them if they would help

with the notifications? Most Ministers that I know would help. Might

even get a Chaplain's program started?

Ron

That would be a good idea but there is not time. What you don't want to happen is someone to text or call and tell the person before you get a chance to get there. So your response needs to be quick. People don't realize just how bad it can be for someone to hear this news over the phone with no one to watch over them. Some people get suicidal. Also I am not the person to get a Chaplain program started as I am not that religious any more but that is another topic. I would not be against having one in the department however but again we are very small at 10 people.

Pat

Edited September 6, 2013 by Alaskapopo

[Sparky]

Pat,

I totally understand about the family being notified before you get the chance. Also about the religious thing.

Not everyone believes as I do, but someone on your dept, perhaps your Chief could take a few minutes to

contact a few churches in your community and set up a meeting to get them on board. We had a Chaplain

on call program, where they volunteered on a monthly basis to help us out..

Ron

[Jon Merricks]

I had to notify my best friends wife and daughter. I still hate the memories of that.

[waynes_world_45]

I had to notify my best friends wife and daughter. I still hate the memories of that.

Damn.....

[Brian Payne]

The courage is always there for the Bar Fights, Domestics, Shots fired, Foot pursuits, Armed Robberies, Vehicle pursuits, Resisting arrest, and all that other fun stuff in Law Enforcement. We are trained for that. No amount of training prepares you for this scenario and it has always been the scariest things for me. It seems to bring Humanity down to its most basic level and it is so foreign to us because we are dealing with good people facing probably the worst thing that will ever happen to them and we can do nothing to help.

I am thankful that in 34 years on the job I have never become hardened enough not to care.

[acu111]

Reading this thread makes me feel that my is nothing, as compares to people that gives notification. More power to you all!

[MacCool]

30 years as a trauma surgeon, 6 years as Assistant Coroner. Yeah, it sucks.

[Jensey]

And for those of us who have to deal with death as part of their employment, the absolute worst thing for us to do is to deal with a death case involving a child. The younger the child is the difficulty increases exponentially. There is nothing more tragic and depressing. Go home, hug your children tight, then hug them again. The general public will never, ever, ever understand.

You are so right. The general public will never understand. People look at me and think I am callous and heartless. You can only watch people die so much until you have to block it out so you don't go crazy. We work our asses off on every patient, but sometimes it is not enough. Sorry you have to do this as well. As charge nurse I always have to go with the doctor to tell the family and then end up picking them up off the floor and trying to console them. It never really gets easier. My husband is in business and has no clue what I deal with.