Athena Posted December 17, 2005 Share Posted December 17, 2005 (edited) I thought this was really funny. http://www.4q.cc/index.php?pid=top100&person=chuck Edited March 4, 2006 by Athena Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tightloop Posted December 17, 2005 Share Posted December 17, 2005 I liked it but there was no mention of Christi Brinkley....my other favorite endorser of athletic equipment... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
benos Posted December 20, 2005 Share Posted December 20, 2005 Thanks - some of those are hilarious! If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blackdragon Posted December 21, 2005 Share Posted December 21, 2005 That Killed me!!!! Ivan Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tomfturner Posted December 21, 2005 Share Posted December 21, 2005 (edited) personal favorite. As a teen Chuck Norris impregnated every nun in a convent tucked away in the hills of Tuscany. Nine months later the nuns gave birth to the 1972 Miami Dolphins, the only undefeated and untied team in professional football history. another good one. Geico saved 15% by switching to Chuck Norris. Edited March 2, 2006 by tomfturner Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Merlin Orr Posted December 21, 2005 Share Posted December 21, 2005 The Top 30 for Mr. T are a hoot also... One that fits this thread. Mr T. and Chuck Norris decided to spar, they travelled to the only safe place in the Universe, the beginning of time. They bowed to each other and Chuck launched in with a roundhouse kick. Mr. T blocked it, and the resulting pressure wave is commonly called the Big Bang. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tightloop Posted December 21, 2005 Share Posted December 21, 2005 Ok, Ok, but who won the fight? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blackdragon Posted December 22, 2005 Share Posted December 22, 2005 Good Point!!!! Ivan Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Athena Posted December 22, 2005 Author Share Posted December 22, 2005 I personally like this.... and by the way, of course Chuck Norris won! When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kimberkid Posted December 22, 2005 Share Posted December 22, 2005 Chuck Norris sleeps with a nightlight, not because he is afriad of the dark, but because the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris. I cant believe after reading several hundred of these I am still laughing a week later Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tokarev Posted December 26, 2005 Share Posted December 26, 2005 Holy crap, dudes! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
XRe Posted December 27, 2005 Share Posted December 27, 2005 holy crap, that's just what I needed.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
XRe Posted December 27, 2005 Share Posted December 27, 2005 Some of Vin Diesel's are pretty sweet, too... If you rearrange the letters in Vin Diesel it reveals his credo: "I End Lives." There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Vin Diesel allows to live. Vin Diesel has two speeds: walk and kill. You are what you eat. That is why Vin Diesel's diet consists entirely of bricks, steel, and the tears of small children. Vin Diesel can divide by zero. and the related Vin Diesel can count backwards from infinity. Sweet.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
short_round Posted March 2, 2006 Share Posted March 2, 2006 ... shamelessly stolen for calguns: Chuck Norris Responds Some of Vin Diesel's are pretty sweet, too... "The integral of ln |x| is Vin Diesel." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kimberkid Posted March 2, 2006 Share Posted March 2, 2006 as an aside, though mentioned in the link. If anyone decides to read his autobiography, dont get real excited. I am a big Norris fan for several reasons and after reading the book am less of one. It was kinda cool to read the series of events he went through in the Karate world, but learning about his affairs and unknown love child kinda made me rethink my admiration for him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harmon Posted March 2, 2006 Share Posted March 2, 2006 The way the wind blows depends on which direction Chuck Norris is kicking ass. i have included this in my sig line Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ben Stoeger Posted March 2, 2006 Share Posted March 2, 2006 Originally Chuck Norris was going to be hired to play the role of Jack Bauer on the show "24". The producers changed their minds when they realized the show would last only 17 minutes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sean Gaines Posted March 2, 2006 Share Posted March 2, 2006 good one Athena LMAO Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TBF Posted March 3, 2006 Share Posted March 3, 2006 You cannot ask Chuck Norris to shoot weakhand,He does not have one. Travis F. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
carinab Posted March 3, 2006 Share Posted March 3, 2006 Bulletproof vests are actually woven from Chuck Norris' beard trimmings. OMG that's funny! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TBF Posted March 6, 2006 Share Posted March 6, 2006 You cannot ask Chuck Norris to shoot minor , Chuck Norris pees harder than that. Travis F. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Precision40 Posted March 6, 2006 Share Posted March 6, 2006 Chuck Norris showed up to an IPSC match once, but "Round-House Kick to the head" wasn't a listed division, so he left. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
diehli Posted March 6, 2006 Share Posted March 6, 2006 Chuck Norris showed up to an IPSC match once, but "Round-House Kick to the head" wasn't a listed division, so he left. After he killed everyone there. Speaking of which, anyone heard anything about Andy Hollar lately? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blackdragon Posted March 10, 2006 Share Posted March 10, 2006 Did you guys know that Chuck Norris has Gasoline in his veins? He has never bled, Thats why the gas prices are so high! Ivan Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Merlin Orr Posted March 12, 2006 Share Posted March 12, 2006 I respect and admire Chuck Norris because he let the Average Joes continue to play... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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