Today's drugs problems.....

[AZ38super]

----- The other day, someone at a store in our town read that a

Meth-amphetamine lab had been found in an old farmhouse in the adjoining

county and he asked me a rhetorical question.

"Why didn't we have a drug problem when you and I were growing up?"

I replied, I had a drug problem when I was young:

I was drug to church on Sunday morning.

I was drug to church for weddings and funerals.

I was drug to family reunions and community socials no matter the

weather.

I was drug by my ears when I was disrespectful to adults.

I was also drug to the woodshed when I disobeyed my parents, told a lie,

brought home a bad report card, did not speak with respect, spoke ill of the

teacher or the preacher, or if I didn't put forth my best

effort in everything that was asked of me.

I was drug to the kitchen sink to have my mouth washed out with soap if I

uttered a profanity.

I was drug out to pull weeds in mom's garden and flowerbeds and

cocklebur's out of dad's fields.

I was drug to the homes of family, friends and neighbors to help out some

poor soul, who had no one to mow the yard, repair the clothesline, or chop

some firewood; and, if my mother had ever known that I took a single dime as

a tip for this kindness, she would have drug me back to the woodshed.

Those drugs are still in my veins and they affect my behavior in

everything I do, say, or think. They are stronger than cocaine, crack, or

heroin; and, if today's children had this kind of drug problem, America

would be a better place.

God bless the parents who drugged us.

Edited February 28, 2008 by AZ38super

[Joe4d]

Unfortunately it seems like all parents want to do is drag kids to the pharmacy. Got an F in spelling ? He needs another pill. It's no wonder when they get older they look for drugs to solve problems.

[SiG Lady]

God, I heard something on the news yesterday that one out of every two or three Americans is taking an 'anti-psychotic' drug. That's an outrage!!!!!!!!!!!!! If there ever was a 'conspiracy' going on in this country, it's Big Pharma and the gov'ment doing this to us! I refuse to take ANYTHING like this stuff. (Yes, there are certain individuals who actually DO need these medications, but NOT 40-50% of the population, for cryin' out loud!)

[tpcdvc]

I couldn't agree more AZ38super. I had the same drug problem as you and I thank God for it everyday. My two boys have the same drug problem and some days I know hate me for it. But I know some day they will love me for it. Parents too often do what is easy and what the child wants but the child ends up suffering. I get up everyday and go to war. No it is not in Iraq, it is on our own soil. Everyday my wife and I battle the onslaught of what our culture would like to teach our children, and everyday it is imperative for us to win each battle. Nothing is more important. Our nations very future depends on it.

[chp5]

Good post AZ38s!

[dstroyed]

Great post and me too.

[Chris Keen]

It's a repeat post, but one of the better ones anyways.

[p99shooter]

At a recent therapy session for my son, the LCSW talked about why discipline methods that worked in the days-of-yore don't really work anymore, or aren't as effective as they used to be. Every child has three concentric circles of influence on their behavior. Circle 1 is their family, Circle 2 is extended family, classmates and friends, and Circle 3 is the rest of the world, or "culture."

Back in the day, a kid complaining to his about getting his mouth washed with soap for saying sh*t in front of his parents would get a sympathetic ear, because the same thing happed to that kid yesterday. If you were a kid and cussed in front of another kid's parents, they would give your mouth a good scrubbing, and when you got home, you'd get round 2.

Nowadays, if that kid complained to their classmate about the soapy taste in his mouth, he'd hear "I tell my Mom to F$#@ Off all the time, and she doesn't punish me. Your parents suck!"

And the same applies for whole ranges of negative behavior and attitudes, like social responsibility, empathy, importance of education, and the list goes on. It's a lot easier to raise kids when everyone around you (circles 2 and 3) feel the same way that you do. Now-a-days, your more likely to find big differences in how certain families feel about what you think is important. In this way, diversity (a big buzz-word) really doesn't help parents raise children.

So, whattya do as a parent? Like tpcdvc says, you're often at war with a society that really doesn't share the same views as you. If you don't have circles 2 and 3 their to support you, you need to get creative with how you raise and discipline. Its easy to veil the influence of circle 3, but much harder for circle 2. If your child is in daily contact with people that don't have the same views as you, you have to be vigilant, and control who the child is in contact with.

My kids are young now, but the time for me to go to war will be coming soon.

[dajarrel]

IMHO, If Circle 1 (the family) disciplines the child as it should and controls ( as best as possible) who is in the child's circle 2, then, when the child is faced with Circle 3, the big bad world, they will already know what is right and won't be guessing.

It's kinda like dry firing. You build the muscle memory (discipline) so that it really doesn't take as much effort to do the right thing when the world comes knocking.

I was as rebellious as any teenager ever could be, but I always knew what was right and I knew there would be consequences for my actions.

Always give a kid a break. Discipline with love.

FWIW

dj

[Kimberkid]

While a good post, you are gonna have to try harder than that to convince me that none of the parents on here who grew up during the 60's and 70's never did drugs. My parents had the stones to be honest, tell us what they did, and how they regretted it. They have now raised 3 drugs free kids not because they stayed so virginally pure, but because they were honest despite their mistakes.

[dajarrel]

Mike,

That is one of the great challenges of being a parent; Helping your child avoid the mistakes you made. Once in high school I smoked something that was later told to me was marijuana. I don't know if it was or wasn't. It didn't do anything for me so I just stayed with beer which is just a liquid depressant

One of the things that I had a problem accepting is the peer pressure that is on teenagers today as compaired to my teenage years. We were under pressure from our friends to drink, where today that is just the norm. The real pressure is applied toward drug use and premarital sex. Don't get me wrong, when I was in school,most guys were trying, but most girls were saying no. But the peer pressure wasn't there.

Tell me if I'm wrong. My son is now almost 27 and when he was in school, even private schools, he said the pressure to use drugs was great.

I applaud your parents raising three drug-free children. Discipline involves a lot more than just punishment for offenses committed. It also involves the honesty you spoke of from the parents.

FWIW

dj

Edited February 29, 2008 by dajarrel

[Kimberkid]

I was a private school kid also. I will admit that I dont give much credit to this notion of peer pressure. It isnt pressure if you say no from the outset, know where you stand, and know you arent going to waver. As soon as people pull the "all the cool kids are doing it", it gets too "after school special" for me and I always started laughing. I have a tough time believing people actually fall for that. However, throughout the private school system, drugs were available, maybe not to the level of public schools, but if I had wanted them, they were to be had.

As far as premartial sex, I dont doubt it is happening now, or even to a potential wider range of younger people. But it aint like the free love movement of the late 60's was brought on by hand holding and hugging.

I always knew that anyone who would even try to push me to do something potentially wrong, drugs, booze, sex (man i wish more girls woulda try to use me), stealing, vandalism or the like isnt a friend to me anyways. Maybe the rest of the young people dont know that these days, but I also have a hard time imagining myself as a visionary or trendsetter. I think the newer generation has a lot more going for them than the older generation gives them credit for sometimes.

[ima45dv8]

I think the newer generation has a lot more going for them than the older generation gives them credit for sometimes.

'Twas always thus.

[dajarrel]

Mike,

I hope you are right. I know there are a lot of good kids out there. I see them every day.

I see good in the coming generation, I just hope it doesn't get overrun by the bad I see.

As for the free love of the 60's....damn, I missed it by a couple of years

dj

[dstroyed]

I don't see where kids today have the same level of responsibility and ownership my friends and i had growing up. I also see the younger generation with the "i want it now" attitude. That creates a lot of conflict in our work place as we don't offer recognition for just showing up. Most of them want more before they "earn" it. We can't and won't teach them what their mommys and daddys didn't.

We had a young 20 something guy working with us once. He wanted a raise. He was late way too often to count and missed a day of work almost every week. Good worker though. His manager offered him a deal. You show up every day for 1 month and not be late and you will get your $1. Needless to say he didn't make the first week and was upset that he didn't get the raise. I was speechless.

Sorry of the topic of the drugs but i think there is some correlation.

[Kimberkid]

I think the same problems society has today is the same problems it has always had, and likely always will have. To assume one generation is much better than another is pure arrogance. We might have a bigger drug problem now, but a few generations back blacks and women werent even considered citizens. Lets not let this snowball into a debate no one will win.