Boudreaux

[Merlin Orr]

CAJUN SHOOTERS

The USPSA shooters in Terrebone Parish, Louisiana went to a Area Shoot. To save money they had to room together. No one wanted to room with

Boudreaux because he snores so bad. They decide it's not fair to make

one of dem stay wit him the whole time so they vote to take turns.

Fontenot sleeps wit him and he come to breakfast next morning hair a

mess, eyes all bloodshot. They say, "Man, what happen to you?"

He say, "Man, that Boudreaux snore so loud, I watch him all night."

Next night Guidry's turn. In the morning, same thing -- hair all

standing up, eyes all bloodshot. They say, "Man, what happened to you? You

look awful!" He say, "Man, no, that Boudreaux shake the roof. I watched him

all night."

Third night, Breaux turn. Next morning he come to breakfast bright

eyed and bushy tailed.

"Good morning you all." They can't believe!

They say, "Man, what happened?" He say, "Well, we get ready for bed. I go

and tuck Boudreaux into bed and kiss him good night.

He watch me all night long.

[tightloop]

Great story...

[Liota]

Pretty darned funny stuff!

L

[warpspeed]

I didn't see that one coming at all

[Dead Buff]

This I will remember!!!!

[bountyhunter]

The teacher asked little Johnny if he could use three words in a sentence: "detail", "defense", and "deduct".

So he thought for a while and said:

"De tail is de last part of de duck to go under de fence."

[Merlin Orr]

Little Johnny is a Cajun????

[tightloop]

Maybe little Boudreaux.......

[ima45dv8]

Three dead bodies turn up at a New Orleans mortuary, all with very big smiles on their faces. Following inspection, the coroner calls the police to tell them what has happened.

"First body: Frenchman, 60, died of heart failure while making love to his mistress. Hence the enormous smile, Inspector," says the Coroner.

"Second body: Scotsman, 25, won a thousand pounds on the lottery, spent it all on whiskey. Died of alcohol poisoning, hence the smile."

The Inspector asked, "What of the third body?"

"Ah," says the coroner, "this is the most unusual one. Boudreaux from Bayou Gauche, 30, struck by lightning."

"Why is he smiling then?" inquires the Inspector.

"Thought he was having his picture taken."

[::bulak::]

aw...cute....but in a morbid way...

[dajarrel]

Boudreaux the Baptist

Boudreaux, a Cajun highlander from Rapides Parish in Central Louisiana, was an older, single gentleman, who was born and raised a Baptist, living in South Louisiana.

Each Friday night after work, he would fire up his outdoor grill and cook a venison steak. Now, all of Boudreaux's neighbors were Catholic... and since it was Lent, they were forbidden from eating meat on Fridays. The delicious aroma from the grilled venison steaks was causing such a problem for the Catholic faithful that they finally talked to their priest.

The priest came to visit Boudreaux, and suggested that Boudreaux convert to Catholicism. After several classes and much study, Boudreaux attended Mass and as the priest sprinkled holy water over him, he said, "You were born a Baptist and raised a Baptist, but now you are Catholic."

Boudreaux's neighbors were greatly relieved, until Friday night arrived, and the wonderful aroma of grilled venison filled the neighborhood.

The priest was called immediately by the neighbors and as he rushed into Boudreaux's yard, clutching a rosary and prepared to scold him, he stopped in amazement and watched.

There stood Boudreaux, clutching a small bottle of water which he carefully sprinkled over the grilling meat, and chanted: "You wuz born a deer and you wuz raised a deer, but now you a catfish."

[Merlin Orr]

Very good....

[ima45dv8]

Last May, Boudreaux married an attractive woman, Lola, half his age.

After several months, Lola complained that she had never climaxed during sex; and according to her Grand Momma, all Cajun women are entitled to a climax at least once in a while.

So, to resolve the problem, they went to see the large-animal Vet since there was no trustworthy doctor anywhere in Pierre Part. The Vet didn't have a clue, but he did recall how, during the hot summer, his Momma and Daddy would fan a cow with a big towel that was having any difficulty breeding. This would cool her down and make her relax.

So, the Vet told them to hire a strong, virile, young man to wave a big towel over them while they were having sex. This, the Vet said, would cause the young wife to cool down, relax, then enjoy that ultimate of pleasures.

So the couple hired a strong young man from the big city of Houma to wave that big towel over them as the Vet suggested.

After many efforts, Lola still had not climaxed! They went back to the Vet. The Vet said for Lola to change partners and let the young man have a try at it while Boudreaux waved the big towel.

They tried it that night and Lola went into wild, screaming, ear-splitting climaxes, one right after the other for about two and a half hours.

When it was over, Boudreaux looked down at the exhausted young man and in a cocky manner said, "And dat, my friend, is how you wave a towel!!"

[bierman]

LMAO

[sfchorn]

In Louisiana , this fella Boudreaux had a bad vehicle accident, caused by an18-wheeler that ran a stop sign.

In court, the trucking company's fancy lawyer was questioning Boudreaux. Didn't you say, at the scene of the accident, "I'm fine"? the lawyer asked.

Boudreaux responded, "Let me done told you what happened. Me, I had jus loaded my favorite mule, Bessie, into da . ."

"I didn't ask for any details," the lawyer interrupted.

"Just answer the question. Did you not say, at the scene of the accident, "I'm fine!"?

Boudreaux said, "I had jus got Bessie into da trailer and I was driving down da road . . "

The lawyer interrupted again and said, "Judge, I am trying to establish the fact that, at the scene of the accident, this man told the State Policeman on the scene that he was just fine. Now several weeks after the accident he is trying to sue my client. I believe he is a fraud. Please tell him to answer the question."

By this time, the Judge was fairly interested in Boudreaux's answer and said to the lawyer, "I'd like to hear what he has to say about his favorite mule, Bessie."

Boudreaux thanked the Judge and proceeded, "I had just loaded Bessie, my favorite mule, into da trailer and was driving her down da highway when dis huge semi-truck and trailer ran da stop sign and smacked my truck right in da side. Me, I was thrown into one ditch and Bessie was thrown into da udder.. I was hurting, real bad and didn't want to move at tall. But, I

could herd ole Bessie moanin and groanin. Me, I knew she was in some kind o' terrible shape just by her groans.

Shortly after da accident, a State Policeman, he came on da scene. He herd Bessie moanin' and groanin' so, him, he went over ta her. After he took hisself a look at her, he took out his gun and shot her between da eyes. Den da Patrolman came cross d a road, gun in hand, and looked at me, and said 'How are you feeling?...'"

"...Now what da hell would you say?!"

[islandtime]

In Louisiana , this fella, Boudreaux, had a bad vehicle accident, caused by

an 18-wheeler that ran a stop sign.

In court, the trucking company's fancy lawyer was questioning Boudreaux:

Didn't you say, at the scene of the accident, "I'm fine"? the lawyer asked..

Boudreaux responded, "Let me told you what happened. Me, I had jus loaded

my favorite mule, Bessie, into da . ."

"I didn't ask for any details," the lawyer interrupted. "Just answer the question. Did you not say, at the scene of the accident,

"I'm fine!"?

Boudreaux said, "I had jus got Bessie into da trailer and I was driving down

da road . . "

The lawyer interrupted again and said, "Judge, I am trying to establish

the fact that, at the scene of the accident, this man told the State

Policeman on the scene that he was just fine. Now several weeks after the

accident he is trying to sue my client. I believe he is a fraud. Please

tell him to answer the question."

By this time, the Judge was fairly interested in Boudreaux's answer and said

to the lawyer, "I'd like to hear what he has to say about his favorite mule,

Bessie.."

Boudreaux thanked the Judge and proceeded, "I had just loaded Bessie, my

favorite mule, into da trailer and was driving her down da highway when dis

huge semi-truck and trailer ran da stop sign and smacked my truck right in

da side. Me, I was thrown into one ditch and Bessie was thrown into da

udder.. I was hurting, real bad and didn't want to move at tall. But, I

could herd ole Bessie moanin and groanin. Me, I knew she was in some kind

o' terrible shape just by her groans.

Shortly after da accident, a State Policeman, he came on da scene. He herd

Bessie moanin' and groanin' so, him, he went over ta her. After he took

hisself a look at her, he took out his gun and shot her between da eyes.

Den da Patrolman came cross da road, gun in hand, and looked at me, and

said 'How are you feeling?...'"

"...Now what da hell would you say?!"

[bayoupirate]

I bet y'all tink y'all reel smart!

HA HA

and FOR YOUR INFORMATION. Mr. Boudreaux does a son named Little Johnny.

Most people around here just call him T-Jon.

That boy can pluck a duck fas-fass.

[EEH]

Boudreaux the Baptist

Boudreaux, a Cajun highlander from Rapides Parish in Central Louisiana, was an older, single gentleman, who was born and raised a Baptist, living in South Louisiana.

Each Friday night after work, he would fire up his outdoor grill and cook a venison steak. Now, all of Boudreaux's neighbors were Catholic... and since it was Lent, they were forbidden from eating meat on Fridays. The delicious aroma from the grilled venison steaks was causing such a problem for the Catholic faithful that they finally talked to their priest.

The priest came to visit Boudreaux, and suggested that Boudreaux convert to Catholicism. After several classes and much study, Boudreaux attended Mass and as the priest sprinkled holy water over him, he said, "You were born a Baptist and raised a Baptist, but now you are Catholic."

Boudreaux's neighbors were greatly relieved, until Friday night arrived, and the wonderful aroma of grilled venison filled the neighborhood.

The priest was called immediately by the neighbors and as he rushed into Boudreaux's yard, clutching a rosary and prepared to scold him, he stopped in amazement and watched.

There stood Boudreaux, clutching a small bottle of water which he carefully sprinkled over the grilling meat, and chanted: "You wuz born a deer and you wuz raised a deer, but now you a catfish."

NOW THAT'S FUNNY

[carter300]

all goot sheet there!

[jasond]

Boudreaux and Bubba were enjoying a cold one at Bubba's trailer.

Bubba says, "hey Boudreaux, If you was out fishin, and I went over your trailer, and I ended up in bed with your 'ol lady, and she was to have a child, would that make us kin?"

Boudreax thinks for a moment, and says "Naw, I don't think so Bubba. But it would make us even."