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Debi Davis


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John, my condolences on both your wife, and now sister.

I know exactly how you feel. I lost my father almost 4 years ago, and I too had that "feeling" when I chose to tell my wife to tell her mother we were going to be running a little late for dinner, because i wanted to check on my father, whom was already at the hospital only 4 days after his birthday, and after he had a triple by pass.

It turns out, I was the last one of the kids to talk with him while he was still concious and alive. He went into a coma he never woke up from 5 minutes after I left his room. He simply told me "you should go now son, I love you." I will NEVER forget that last moment with my dad.

It's been a lot harder on me than i care to admit. Sharing this with others, and "allowing" people to be there for me has also helped me out a lot.

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The synchronicity here is..... well it just is. Two years ago this weekend was the last time I saw or spoke to my father. Leslie and I were getting ready to move to Phoenix. Dad was ravaged with advanced Parkinsons but still living with my mom at the retirement community. Leslie and I went over to visit one last time. Lucidity for dad was pretty transitory at that point and I was lucky enough I guess to realize that this might be the last time I saw him. I was able to thank him for everything he had been to me throughout my life, that he had always been my hero and that I loved him. His eyes had been a little dim that evening and I wasn't sure how much he was getting. Leslie and I were getting ready to leave when for whatever reason he came back out of the bedroom in his walker and looked at me with his eyes just full of life and mischief and a smile on his face like he was 40 years younger. He shook my hand, said we needed to get going and that he better get off to bed. He turned and headed back to bed. It was his last and perhaps most amazing gift to me. Four days later he fell and never realized where he was again.

Don't mean to hijack the thread here but talking about that last call sure triggered this. John, I am so sorry for both your losses and I am so glad you got to speak to your sister that last time.

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