zhunter Posted June 25, 2007 Share Posted June 25, 2007 HELL EXPLAINED BY CHEMISTRY STUDENT The following is an actual question given on a Universityof Washingtonchemistry mid term. The answer by one student was so "profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well : Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)? Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant. One student, however, wrote the following: First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which soul s are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added. This gives two possibilities: 1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose. 2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over. So which is it? If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, "It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you," and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accept ing any more souls and is therefore, extinct......leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting "Oh my God." THIS STUDENT RECEIVED AN A+. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SiG Lady Posted June 25, 2007 Share Posted June 25, 2007 I want to marry this guy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
carinab Posted June 25, 2007 Share Posted June 25, 2007 (edited) Busted! It's already been posted... Not just once.... but twice... Edited June 25, 2007 by carinab Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zhunter Posted June 25, 2007 Author Share Posted June 25, 2007 Busted! It's already been posted...Not just once.... but twice... 3 times is a charm!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
racerba Posted June 25, 2007 Share Posted June 25, 2007 It's already been posted... Oh Hell!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
38superman Posted June 25, 2007 Share Posted June 25, 2007 (edited) This definately should not be posted again until hell either busts loose or freezes over. By the way, where can I find this Teresa person? I like the ones that are vocal. She's my kind of girl. Tony Edited June 25, 2007 by 38superman Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
folsoml Posted June 25, 2007 Share Posted June 25, 2007 Busted! It's already been posted...Not just once.... but twice... I hadn't seen it, so it was new to me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nemo Posted June 25, 2007 Share Posted June 25, 2007 Oldie but goodie! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tightloop Posted June 25, 2007 Share Posted June 25, 2007 Makes me smile when they yell, " OOOOOOOOOOOH GOD"..... at least that is what Zhunter told me I should listen for... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HSMITH Posted June 25, 2007 Share Posted June 25, 2007 TL, before that grin gets too big just make sure your elbow isn't on her hair Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SiG Lady Posted June 25, 2007 Share Posted June 25, 2007 Especially those of us with long hair! It can ruin everything!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kurtm Posted June 25, 2007 Share Posted June 25, 2007 Oldie is right! I got this durring my thermo-dynamics class way back in the dark ages of the middle sevnties. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nemo Posted June 27, 2007 Share Posted June 27, 2007 Oldie is right! I got this durring my thermo-dynamics class way back in the dark ages of the middle sevnties. Pre-www? Wow, older than I thought. You're older than I thought too... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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