ima45dv8 Posted January 16, 2012 Share Posted January 16, 2012 Oh my lord. What a three hours I just spent. OMG.... I just got off the phone talking to a great and viscerally close friend, my former Father in Law. We're strapped together at a basic level. Jim was and still is a most dear and kindred soul. He's an Honest-To-God cowboy from Wyoming. Picture making your life and living in a saddle for the best of your life. That's Jim. We haven't spoke for almost 10 years because I held him at arms-length over the divorce. I bore him in no ill will over that shit whatever, but my position was and has been, that she was his daughter and deserved and needed his unwavering love and support. Mine and Jim's close relationship be damned. Right or wrong aside (these things tend to get mixed up in divorces) ...she's his daughter and has a right to his strength. It's broken my heart so many times to ignore his overtures. It still does. His wife recently sent me a Christmas card which included a description of his physical plights. It got to me. I always wanted so bad to continue being his friend but thought I couldn't. But just like calling your best buddy after a stupid pause, and talking about nothing and savoring each moment...we talked for most of three hours. How times change, and yet stay the same. Coolness... I spent tonight talking with Jim and now sit here crying like hell because I haven't done so sooner. My heart is both breaking and warming. Y'all would like him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DWFAN Posted January 16, 2012 Share Posted January 16, 2012 Sounds good to me. Nothing wrong with friends that survive something like divorce in a family. Speaks volumes for you and him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris Keen Posted January 16, 2012 Share Posted January 16, 2012 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GrumpyOne Posted January 16, 2012 Share Posted January 16, 2012 You weren't his son in law, you were his son (at least I think that's the way he thought of it). I'm very happy for you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seth Posted January 16, 2012 Share Posted January 16, 2012 My guess is that the qualities you married in his daughter were instilled by her father... Cool story. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EEH Posted January 16, 2012 Share Posted January 16, 2012 What a grown man crying ??? that shows you are quite a man yourself,,congratulation Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nik Habicht Posted January 18, 2012 Share Posted January 18, 2012 We haven't spoke for almost 10 years because I held him at arms-length over the divorce. I bore him in no ill will over that shit whatever, but my position was and has been, that she was his daughter and deserved and needed his unwavering love and support. Mine and Jim's close relationship be damned. I'm glad you figured out that the two don't have to be mutually exclusive..... Savor the relationships you build in life.... :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ima45dv8 Posted January 18, 2012 Author Share Posted January 18, 2012 We haven't spoke for almost 10 years because I held him at arms-length over the divorce. I bore him in no ill will over that shit whatever, but my position was and has been, that she was his daughter and deserved and needed his unwavering love and support. Mine and Jim's close relationship be damned. I'm glad you figured out that the two don't have to be mutually exclusive..... Savor the relationships you build in life.... :D I hope she can finally accept that I have a friendship with her Dad without thinking it a personal effrontery. I don't think she can (extreme Drama Queen syndrome), but that's her problem...no longer mine. Sadly, I doubt it's in her to see things in an objective manner. I hope I'm wrong. I'm beyond worrying about her feelings over who I have in my life. Jim's my buddy, and she and her folks will just have to get used to it. Though the skies may fall (in her world), he's on my short-list of friends and will remain so. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GEN-4-35 Posted January 19, 2012 Share Posted January 19, 2012 Had my wife read this..... She says she love you, Mark. Sure hope we are both on that short list of yours too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nik Habicht Posted January 19, 2012 Share Posted January 19, 2012 We haven't spoke for almost 10 years because I held him at arms-length over the divorce. I bore him in no ill will over that shit whatever, but my position was and has been, that she was his daughter and deserved and needed his unwavering love and support. Mine and Jim's close relationship be damned. I'm glad you figured out that the two don't have to be mutually exclusive..... Savor the relationships you build in life.... :D I hope she can finally accept that I have a friendship with her Dad without thinking it a personal effrontery. I don't think she can (extreme Drama Queen syndrome), but that's her problem...no longer mine. Sadly, I doubt it's in her to see things in an objective manner. I hope I'm wrong. I'm beyond worrying about her feelings over who I have in my life. Jim's my buddy, and she and her folks will just have to get used to it. Though the skies may fall (in her world), he's on my short-list of friends and will remain so. If she can't, that's her problem -- not yours..... No need to enable.... I'm glad you reconnected! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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