February

[benos]

My favorite sketch from that episode was How to defend yourselves against anyone who attacks you armed with a piece of fresh fruit.

Actually that's it! The self defense sketch is a riot.

[PhilTerry]

Wide45 - are you sure? I thought he was putting the tuck in the Airedale in the parrot sketch.

[D.Hayden]

Bring out your dead !! Bring out your dead !!

I want to go for a walk.

You're not fooling anyone!

[Airedale]

I, of course, liked the Airedale.

This is Phoebe.

Dave

[wide45]

There is so much Python on the net!

It is not easy to come up with a real trivia question that can't be searched out in three minutes.

The Pet Shop Sketch from "And Now For Something Completely Different"

A customer enters a pet shop.

Customer: 'Ello, I wish to register a complaint.

(The owner does not respond.)

C: 'Ello, Miss?

Owner: What do you mean "miss"?

C: <pause> I'm sorry, I have a cold.  I wish to make a complaint!

O: We're closin' for lunch.

C: Never mind that, my lad.  I wish to complain about this parrot what I

  purchased not half an hour ago from this very boutique.

O: Oh yes, the, uh, the Norwegian Blue...What's,uh...What's wrong with it?

M=Man [JC], S=Shopkeeper [MP], G=Harry [GC]

Caption: A PET SHOP SOMEWHERE NEAR MELTON MOWBRAY

M Good morning, I'd like to buy a cat.

S Certainly sir. I've got a lovely terrier. [indicates a box on the counter]

M no, I want a cat really.

S [taking box off counter and then putting it back on counter as if it is a

different box] Oh yeah, how about that?

M [looking in box] No, that's the terrier.

S Well, it's as near as dammit.

M Well what do you mean? I want a cat.

S Listen, tell you what. I'll file its legs down a bit, take its snout out,

stick a few wires through its cheeks. There you are, a lovely pussy cat.

M Its not a proper cat.

S What do you mean?

M Well it wouldn't miaow.

S Well it would howl a bit.

M No, no, no, no. Er, have you got a parrot?

S No, I'm afraid not actually guv, we're fresh out of parrots. I'll tell you

what though ... I'll lop its back legs off, make good, strip the fur, stick a

couple of wings on and staple on a beak of your own choice. [taking small box

and rattling it] No problem. Lovely parrot.

M how long would that take?

S Oh, let me see ... er, stripping the fur off, no legs ... [calling] Harry

... can you do a parrot job on this terrier straight away?

H [off-screen] No, I'm still putting a tuck in the Airedale, and then I got

the frogs to let out.

[PhilTerry]

I made the mistake of trying to work from a very old memory!