Shooter Grrl Posted April 19, 2004 Share Posted April 19, 2004 Two lawyers had been stranded on a deserted island for several months. The only other thing on the island was a tall coconut tree, which provided their food. Each day one of the lawyers climbed to the top of the tree to see if he could see a rescue boat coming. One day the lawyer yelled down from the tree, "Wow. I can't believe my eyes. There is a girl out there floating in our direction." The lawyer on the ground was most skeptical and said, "I think you're hallucinating and should come down right now." So the lawyer reluctantly climbed down the tree and told his friend that he had just actually seen a naked blonde woman floating face up headed toward their island. The other lawyer started to laugh, thinking his friend had surely lost his mind. But within a few minutes, up to their beach floated a naked blonde woman, face up, and totally unconscious. The two lawyers went over to her and discovered that she was indeed alive. One said to the other, "You know, we've been on this island for months. It's been a long time. Do you think we should, you know, screw her?" The other lawyer glanced down at the totally naked woman and asked, "Out of what?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
reneet Posted April 19, 2004 Share Posted April 19, 2004 Classic! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SiG Lady Posted April 19, 2004 Share Posted April 19, 2004 It figures. Now, I wonder what an ENGINEER would say in that situation...??... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andrew B Posted April 19, 2004 Share Posted April 19, 2004 My favorite lawyer joke: What's the problem with lawyer jokes? Lawyers don't think they're funny and no one else thinks they're jokes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shooter Grrl Posted April 19, 2004 Author Share Posted April 19, 2004 That's funny Andrew! I just had to share it with my 8 office mates cause I was laughing so loud they just HAD to know what I was doing! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DogmaDog Posted April 19, 2004 Share Posted April 19, 2004 Sig: Isn't this where you tell the one about the engineer who rides up on his new bike, and explains that this beautiful blond rode up to him, got off the bike, ripped off all her clothes and said "Take whatever you want!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SiG Lady Posted April 19, 2004 Share Posted April 19, 2004 Dog-- Yes. Exactly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AikiDale Posted April 20, 2004 Share Posted April 20, 2004 My favorite lawyer joke:What's the problem with lawyer jokes? Lawyers don't think they're funny and no one else thinks they're jokes. My favorite Lawyer joke as well. Second favorite Lawyer joke: What is the difference between a lawyer and an onion? No one cries when you chop up a lawyer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skywalker Posted April 20, 2004 Share Posted April 20, 2004 Now, I wonder what an ENGINEER would say in that situation...??... Easy: he would do the job, constantly bitching about being forced to do it without proper tools... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carlos Posted April 20, 2004 Share Posted April 20, 2004 Heeeey, I resemble those remarks! Its not funny. You think its funny?!? I don't think its funny. No, its not funny at all. No, not funny! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bigsaxdog Posted April 20, 2004 Share Posted April 20, 2004 what's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? one's a cold blooded, garbage eating bottom feeder...........and the other one's a fish!!! (lawyers always love this one!) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IPSCDRL Posted April 20, 2004 Share Posted April 20, 2004 Well a certain Mr. Cohen (A recovering attorney himself) tells me that; The definition of a lawyer is “a Jewish boy that can’t stand the sight of blood”. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dajarrel Posted April 20, 2004 Share Posted April 20, 2004 I guess I'll throw my favorite in: What do you call 2000 lawyers on the bottom of the ocean??? A good start! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jkmccoy Posted April 21, 2004 Share Posted April 21, 2004 Research biologists (such as myself) actually like lawyers. In fact, we are currently looking into methods to involve more lawyers in biological research. Current plans are to replace all laboratory rats with lawyers. Although this may seem like an outrageous suggestion there are numerous arguments that support the use of lawyers instead of lab rats in most experiments: 1) Lawyers are much more common than lab rats. 2) You don't get attached to lawyers. 3) There are some things you just can't get a rat to do. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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