Tman33_99 Posted June 27, 2006 Share Posted June 27, 2006 F*ck you, cleaning the fridge. How the hell do you get so dirty? I don't eat in there, I simply store food. What the f*ck is that stain on the bottom shelf? Do gnomes have parties in here when I'm at work or something? Nasty little gnomes. And, for some reason, I feel really, really vulnerable when I'm bent over, scrubbing your gross shelves. Don't know why. So thank you for keeping my beer cold, but f*ck you for making a mess of it. F*ck you, paying bills. Every damn month? Are you kidding me? I barely even watched TV this month, I still gotta shell out all that cash? And, while I'm at it, f*ck your pathetic little late fees. They're small enough for me to easily ignore them but they add up over time. So thank you for the electricity, water and internet, but f*ck you for your constant demands. F*ck you, deleting old porn to make room for new porn. What man can make this decision? It's like choosing which of my kids to leave behind on the sinking ship. Am I tired of that one slightly chubby girl who doesn't make much noise? F*ck, this is killing me. I hate my old ass computer. F*ck you, changing light bulbs. It's 2006, right? I was pissed when I wasn't issued a jetpack in 2000 (where's my f*cking raygun?!?), but I figured by now technology would've at least advanced to the point where I don't have to stand on my wobbly chair and deal with this crap. Two bonus f*ck yous: for scaring the crap out of me when I walk into a darkened room, innocently flick the switch and get momentarily blinded by that huge flash and terrifying pop! Also, for somehow convincing your lightbulb brethren to join you, causing a chain reaction that means I'm filled with fear whenever I turn on a light. Pop! Pop! Pop! What, did you all join in a suicide pact while I was asleep? Bastards. F*ck you, washing dishes. Yes, I know, you smell funny, and I know the longer I wait, the more weird slime stuff is just gonna accumulate on you. That's why I've pretty much switched to just using paper plates (f*ck you, environment) and eating with my hands. I'm a caveman in an apartment. Finally, f*ck you, writing this rant. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AlamoShooter Posted June 27, 2006 Share Posted June 27, 2006 My eyes my eyes ...I think I just got a bruse on my eyes I think a U is stuck in my eye Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bigbadaboom Posted June 27, 2006 Share Posted June 27, 2006 WTF? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Flyin40 Posted June 27, 2006 Share Posted June 27, 2006 Flyin40 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ErikW Posted June 27, 2006 Share Posted June 27, 2006 Awesome! And the reference to Where's my jet pack?! made me revisit that classic. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DJPoLo Posted June 27, 2006 Share Posted June 27, 2006 Outstanding! -Chet Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bayoupirate Posted June 29, 2006 Share Posted June 29, 2006 How'd you do that? It's like you read my mind! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AikiDale Posted June 29, 2006 Share Posted June 29, 2006 Somebody needs a new girl friend. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blackdragon Posted June 30, 2006 Share Posted June 30, 2006 Ivan Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shooter Grrl Posted July 7, 2006 Share Posted July 7, 2006 Somebody needs a new girl friend. F*ck you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tman33_99 Posted July 8, 2006 Author Share Posted July 8, 2006 Thanks Kath....You took the words right out of my mouth. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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