OnlyAlpha1124 Posted November 17, 2004 Share Posted November 17, 2004 1. I can see your point, but I still think you're full of shit. 2. I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce. 3. How about never? Is never good for you? 4. I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public. 5. I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to see it my way. 6. I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter. 7. I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message. 8. I don't work here. I'm a consultant. 9. It sounds like English, but I can't understand a damn word you're saying. 10. Ahhh...I see the screw-up fairy has visited us again... 11. I like you. You remind me of myself when I was young and stupid. 12. You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers. 13. I have plenty of talent and vision; I just don't give a damn. 14. I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth. 15. I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you 16. Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view. 17. The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist. 18. Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental. 19. What am I? Flypaper for freaks!? 20. I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant. 21. It's a thankless job, but I've got a lot of Karma to burn off. 22. Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial. 23. And your crybaby whiny-assed opinion would be...? 24 Do I look like a people person? 25. This isn't an office. It's Hell with fluorescent lighting. 26. I started out with nothing & still have most of it left. 27. Sarcasm is just one more service we offer. 28. If I throw a stick, will you leave? 29. Errors have been made. Others will be blamed. 30. Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed. 31. I'm trying to imagine you with a personality. 32. A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door. 33. Can I trade this job for what's behind door #1? 34. Too many freaks, not enough circuses. 35. Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it? 36. Chaos, panic, & disorder -- my work here is done. 37. How do I set a laser printer to stun? 38. I thought I wanted a career; turns out I just wanted a salary. 39. Who lit the fuse on your tampon? 40. Oh I get it... like humor... but different. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dajarrel Posted November 17, 2004 Share Posted November 17, 2004 Oh, how I wish I knew the setting to get a laser printer to stun!!!!! dj Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rhino Posted November 17, 2004 Share Posted November 17, 2004 My credit card is set to "kill" at the beginning of the month, but by the end of the month, it's barely able to "stun." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blackdragon Posted November 17, 2004 Share Posted November 17, 2004 I was looking for a job when I found this one! Ivan Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SiG Lady Posted November 17, 2004 Share Posted November 17, 2004 I am NO LONGER 'looking for a job' because of ALL of these...! ...but was amused by #3, #6, #8, #37 in particular. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigDave Posted November 17, 2004 Share Posted November 17, 2004 41. No. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bountyhunter Posted November 18, 2004 Share Posted November 18, 2004 "instead of arguing about the schedule, why don't you just tell me the date you promised the customer and then I will know when the project will be officially late." AHHHHHH.... I see that you used the ATAMO tasking model when you made up the schedule for this project. ATAMO: And Then A Miracle Occurs Explain to me again why I should care, only this time include more money. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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