mspingy

It does not pay to cheat. http://www.banthis.com/index.php?xid=media...5c406e4b53a4a83

If you think your job is bad, check out these unfortunate ones. http://www.reallybadjobs.com/

Impressive display for fire power. http://www.banthis.com/index.php?xid=media...5c406e4b53a4a83

On my last 2 jokes I did a search and found no reference to the jokes I posted even though both jokes had been previously posted. If this is the case please forgive me. Enjoy the video. http://www.guzer.com/videos/dog_cheater.php

Don't put up with a mean boss. Find the 6 ways to confront his bad manners. http://www.guzer.com/games/whackboss.php

Sorry for the problem. Watch video #8. http://www.cpwsa.com/humor.htm

Well, I didn't think that I would have to say this but this is just another story that I found on the internet. You need to mellow out. This is a joke forum.

ANGER MANAGEMENT When you occasionally have a really bad day, and you just need to take it out on someone, don't take it out on someone you know, take it out on someone you don't know. I was sitting at my desk when I remembered a phone call I had forgotten to make. I found the number and dialed it. A man answered, saying, "Hello." I politely said, "This is Andrew. Could I please speak with Robin Carter?" Suddenly, the phone was slammed down on me. I couldn't believe that anyone could be so rude. I tracked down Robin's correct number and called her. I had transposed the last two digits of her phone number. After hanging up with her, I decided to call the 'wrong' number again. When the same guy answered the phone, I yelled, "You're an a** hole!" and hung up. I wrote his number down with the word 'a** hole' next to it, and put it in my desk drawer! . Every couple of weeks, when I was paying bills or had a really bad day, I'd call him up and yell, "You're an a** hole!" It always cheered me up. When Caller ID came to our area, I thought my therapeutic 'a** hole' calling would have to stop. So, I called his number and said, "Hi, this is John Smith from the Telephone Company. I'm just calling to see if you're familiar with the Caller ID program?" He yelled, "NO!" and slammed the phone down. I quickly called him back and said, "That's because you're an a**hole!" One day I was at the store, getting ready to pull into a parking spot. Some guy in a black BMW cut me off and pulled into the spot I had patiently waited for. I hit the horn and yelled that I had been waiting for the spot. The idiot ignored me. I noticed a "For Sale" sign in his car window ..so, I wrote down his number. A couple of days later, right after calling the first a** hole, (I had his number on speed dial), I thought I had better call the BMW a**hole, too. I said, "Is this the man with the black BMW for sale?" "Yes, it is." "Can you tell me where I can see it?" "Yes, I live at 1802 West 34th Street. It's a yellow house, and the car's parked right out in front" "What's your name?" I asked. "My name is Don Hansen," he said. "When's a good time to catch you, Don?" "I'm home every evening after five." "Listen, Don, can I tell you something?" "Yes?" "Don, you're an a** hole." Then I hung up, and added his number to my speed dial, too. Now, when I had a problem, I had two a** holes to call. But after several months of calling them, it wasn't as enjoyable as it used to be. So, I came up with an idea. I called A** hole #1. "Hello." "You're an a** hole!" (But I didn't hang up.) "Are you still there?" he asked. "Yeah," I said. "Stop calling me," he screamed. "Make me," I said. "Who are you?" he asked. "My name is Don Hansen." "Yeah? Where do you live?" "A** hole, I live at 1802 West 34th Street, a yellow house, with my black beamer parked in front." He said, "I'm coming over right now, Don. And you had better start saying your prayers." I said, "Yeah, like I'm really scared, a** hole." Then I called A** hole #2. "Hello?" he said. "Hello, a** hole," I said. He yelled, "If I ever find out who you are..." "You'll what?" I said. "I'll kick your ass," he exclaimed. I answered, "Well, a** hole, here's your chance. I'm coming over right now." Then I hung up and immediately called the police, saying that! I lived at 1802 West 34th Street, and that I was on my way over there to kill my gay lover. Then I called Channel 13 News about the gang war going down on West 34th Street. I quickly got into my car and headed over to 34th street There I saw two a** holes beating the crap out of each other in front of six squad cars, a police helicopter, and news crew. NOW, I feel better. Anger management at it's very best.

Two travelers are walking the back country of Europe when they find themselves standing before a large and apparently very deep hole in the ground. One man lets out a low whistle and asks, "I wonder how deep this hole is?" His friend shrugs, leans down and picks up a small rock. "Let's find out." He then drops the rock into the hole. When the men don't hear the rock hit the bottom, they raise eyebrows. "Wow," said the first man. "This is a deep hole." He then looks around a little, finds a much larger rock and heaves it into the hole. The men wait and still hear nothing. "Wow," said the second man, shaking his head. "This is a REALLY deep hole." Now the two men are hooked and determined to find out just how deep the silly hole is. So they wander off a bit and find themselves on a pasture behind a small country home. In the center of the pasture is sitting a large railroad tie. Near the house, they see a small grey goat grazing. Seeing no one around, the two men use all their strength and drag the railroad tie to the edge of the hole and push it in. They wait and hear nothing. Suddenly, a goat comes running towards them, but he doesn't attack. Instead, he leaps into the hole!! The men are now not only curious and frustrated, but very, very puzzled. They remember seeing a similar goat grazing by the nearby farm house and so they hurry over and knock on the door. An old man answers the door. "May I help you boys?" One of the men steps forward. "Sir, you may know that there is a very deep hole near your house...." The man nods. "Oh, yes, a very deep one -- I know that hole. I make sure my animals go nowhere near it." The travelers continues, "But sir, we believe we just saw one of your goats come running to the hole and then jump right down into it!" The farmer smiles faintly and shakes his head. "Noooo, not my goat. I keep my goat tied to the old railroad tie in my back yard."

There have been an average of 160,000 troops stationed in Iraq during the last 22 months. During this time the firearm death total was 2,112 for a firearm death rate of 60 per 100,000. The rate in Washington DC is 80.6 per 100,000. That means that you are more likely to be shot and killed in our Nation's Capitol, which has some of the strictest gun control laws in the nation, than you are in Iraq. Conclusion: We should immediately pull out of Washington, D.C.

1. Muslims do not recognize Judaism as a religion. 2. Jews do not recognize Jesus as the Messiah. 3. Protestants do not recognize the Pope as the leader of the Christian faith. 4. Baptists do not recognize each other at Hooters.

`WOMEN'S HUMOR > > > > My husband came home with a tube of K Y jelly and said, "This will > > make you happy tonight." He was right. When he went out of the > > bedroom, I squirted it all over the doorknobs. He couldn't get back in. > > One night an 87 yr old woman came home from Bingo to find her 92 > > year-old husband in bed with another woman. She became violent > > and ended up pushing him off the balcony of their 20th floor assisted > > living apartment, killing him instantly. Brought before the court on > > a charge of murder, the judge asked her if she had anything to say > > in her defense. She began coolly, > > Yes, your honor, I figured that at 92, if he could have sex...he could > fly.

Two Norwegian hunters from Minnesota got a pilot to fly them to Canada to hunt moose. They bagged six. As they started loading the plane for the return trip, the pilot said the plane could take only four moose. > The two lads objected strongly. "Last year we shot six and the pilot let us put them all on board; he had the same plane as yours." Reluctantly, the pilot gave in and all six were loaded. However, even on full power, the little plane couldn't handle the load and went down a few moments after take-off. > Climbing out of the wreck one Norski asked the other, "Any idea where we are?" "Yaaah I tink we's pretty close to where we crashed last year." >

Funny cartoon about Bush. http://atomfilms.shockwave.com/afassets/flash/rumple_1.swf

I just bought a new Savage 22-250 Series 12 varmint rifle and I want to break it in. What is the best technique to ensure maximum accuracy?

Cameras are posted in the bathrooms of many police departments to hopefully catch or prevent illegal activity. They are also there for people's (such as the drunk womens') safety.

A real first class loser! http://www.goyk.com/video.asp?path=1647

Don't use Coke?

http://guncontrolalliance.org/disarm_man.htm

1. You Are Different and That's Bad 2. The Boy Who Died From Eating All His Vegetables 3. Dad's New Wife Bruce 4. Fun Four-letter Words to Know and Share 5. Hammers, Screwdrivers and Scissors: An I-Can-Do-It Book 6. The Kids' Guide to Hitchhiking 7. Kathy Was So Bad Her Mom Stopped Loving Her 8. Curious George and the Rotweilers 9. All Cats Go to Hell 10. The Little Sissy Who Snitched 11. Some Kittens Can Fly. 12. That's it, I'm Putting You Up for Adoption 13. Grandpa Gets a Casket 14. The Magic World Inside the Abandoned Refrigerator 15. Garfield Gets Feline Leukemia 16. The Pop-Up Book of Human Anatomy 17. Strangers Have the Best Candy 18. Whining, Kicking and Crying to Get Your Way 19. You Were an Accident 20. Things Rich Kids Have, But You Never Will 21. Pop! Goes The Hamster...And Other Great Microwave Games 22. The Man in the Moon Is Actually Satan 23. Where Would You Like to Be Buried? 24. Used Toilet Paper and Your Babysitter 24. Why Can't Mr. Fork and Ms. Electrical Outlet Be Friends? 25. Daddy Drinks Because You Cry

Now see it in black & white.

A poor lost soul. http://www.big-boys.com/articles/pokerroom1.html

Are you a butt weasel?

This is true.

This kid has it right!