New Parrot

[Shipster]

A woman went to a pet shop and immediately spotted a large beautiful parrot. There was a sign on the cage that said $50.00. "Why so little," she asked the pet store owner.

The owner looked at her and said, "Look, I should tell you first that this bird used to live in a house of prostitution, and sometimes it says some pretty vulgar stuff."

The woman thought about this, but decided she had to have the bird anyway. She took it home and hung the bird's cage up in her living room and waited for it to say something. The bird looked around the room, then at her, and said, "New house, new madam."

The woman was a bit shocked at the implication, but then thought "that's not so bad."

When her two teenage daughters returned from school the bird saw them and said, "New house, new madam, new girls." The girls and the woman were a bit offended but then began to laugh about the situation.

Moments later, the woman's husband, Keith, came home from work. The bird looked at him and said, "Hi Keith."  

[Julien Boit]

A guy want to buy a pet for his son's birthday.

He goes to a pet shop and see some parrots at the shop :

The first one looks goergous, but it costs $100.

The man asks the vendor :

- "why this one is so expensive ?

- "because he speaks spanish "

The man see another one, a little bit less gorgeous but it's $150

- "this one is more expensive than the first , but it looks uglier "

-"Yes but this one speaks spanish and english"replied the vendor

The man now look at a third parrot, uglier than the two first but lots more expensive $250

-"this one speaks spanish, english, answer the phone and can type" explained the vendor.

Then the man looks at the ugliest of all the parrots in the shop, it's in the dark, at the bottom of the shop.

-"What about this one ?"

-"This one costs $500"

-"what ?!!! $500 what about this one , he types ?speaks spanish, german, english ?

- "No"

- "No ? what do he do ?"

- "Nothing"

- "Nothing ?"

- "Absolutely nothing"

- "If he does nothing, why the hell did he cost $500 ?"

- "I don't know, but all the others call him Boss "

DVC

Julien