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Duct Tape

Merlin Orr

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Contrary to popular opinion, duct tape IS NOT good for fixing everything!!!

Jeff walks into a bar and sees his friend Paul slumped over the bar. He walks over and asks Paul what's wrong.

"Well," replies Paul, "You know that beautiful girl at work that I wanted to ask out, but I got "excited" every time I saw her?"

"Yes," replies Jeff with a laugh.

"Well," says Paul, straightening up, "I finally worked up the courage to ask her out, and she agreed."

"That's great!" says Jeff, When are you going out?"

"I met her the other evening," continues Paul, "but I was worried I'd get "excited" again. So I got some duct tape and taped my "thang" to my leg, so if I did it, it wouldn't show."

"Sensible," says Jeff.

"So I get to her door," says Paul, "and I rang her doorbell. She answered it in the sheerest, tiniest, dress you ever saw."

"And then what happened?" asked Jeff.

(Paul slumps back over the bar again.) "I kicked her in the face."

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  • 7 years later...

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