Man's Facelift

[Merlin Orr]

A man decided to have a face lift for his birthday. He spends $5,000

and feels really good about the result. On his way home he stops at a

newsstand and buys a paper.

Before leaving he says to the sales clerk, "I hope you don't mind me

asking, but how old do you think I am?"

"About 35," was the reply.

"I'm actually 47," the man says happily.

A little while later he goes to McDonald's for lunch and asks the

order taker the same question, to which the reply is, "I'd guess that

you're 29?"

"Nope, I am actually 47." He's starting to feel really good about

himself.

While standing at the bus stop he asks an old woman the same question.

She replies, "I am 85 years old and my eyesight is going. But when I

was young there was a sure way of telling a man's age. If I put my

hand down your pants and play with your "thang" for ten minutes I will

be able to tell your exact age."

As there was no one else around the man thought what the hell and let

her slip her hand down his pants.

Ten minutes later the old lady says, "OK, it's done. You are 47,"

Stunned the man says, "That was brilliant! How did you do that?"

The old lady replies, "I was behind you in McDonald's".

[tightloop]

Those sneaky old women....

[mcoliver]