Calamity Jane

OK, I saw that comercial again tonight. Anyone else notice that only 1 guy (who doesn't look like an Olympian) takes a bite of the sandwich. The others just hold it and look at it. It's like...I'm getting paid to hold this fat bomb, but I know better than to let it touch my lips Just an observation.

Now that made me laugh !!

Thanks Hop!! Loved seeing you and shooting with you. I'll miss seeing your mug at Nats! #19 Prep Loaded 300 rounds Cleaned gun Dry fire session Tomorrow league night: focus steel Al's got me watching women's beach volley ball Misty May is buff! XRE I think she could be spartan! May and Walsh ROCK That's what I was watching as I loaded. BTW, Is anyone else offended by the McDonald's comercial that shows the buff athletes choking down chicken sandwiches for breakfast?? Sure they are good but am I going to look like THEM if I choose to eat a chicken sandwich for breakfast? I don't think so.

Yes yes yes! Try saying this in your head....I'm becoming a ___________________ I have found the state of becoming is much more rewarding then arriving. That's just me FWIW

Another HOA at Riley today.

Why does it matter? Are you saying you'll put more or different preparation into YOUR game based on who you're shooting with? Yes....more into my mental game. PM sent to Catfish

#20 Riley Match Not as good as yesterday. I understand why and it's OK. I'm going to tweak my training a little for the next 3 weeks. I'm going back into dry fire pretty heavy. I haven't been doing it related to all the loading and live fire shooting. Plus, I was showing some repetitive injury stress to my wrist and elbows. However, my shooting is showing some weakness in the basics. Like getting on target quickly. My draws are poor. SO here's the plan: Back into dry fire this week...I'm thinking everyday as long as the body tolerates it. League night on Tuesday: It's going to be a steel match. Take this upcoming weekend off from shooting...just shoot at home. I like where I'm at in my preparation. The one thing looming out there is "who" will I be shooting with at Nationals. I wish they would post that so I could do the mental work I need to do.

Thanks XRE and Dave for the info. #21 Owensboro Match I've had an amazing day. Dave and I traveled to Owensboro to shoot with Hopalong. Shooting with Hop is like shooting with a brother. We're family in a sense. (Isn't that right Hop? ) Anyway, it was a beautiful day, I shot well, Dave and I enjoyed our alone time together on the road, we saw some friends, and made some new ones. It was a great day. Highlights that I'll remember: Teddy says to me, "You're scarey." I put my arm around him and say, "I'm not scarey." He then says, "Yes you are. You're getting too good." My new friend Mike called me a "B-Master" Max (GM open shooter) says to me, "You beat me on a stage last week" I say, "Yeah, isn't that great" and then I make him give me a bump with our fist. Hopalong tells me what he saw I did wrong (I lost my dot a couple of times) and then I say, "Yeah, but what did I do right?" He says, "Everything else". Have I said it was a good day? It was. Thanks Owensboro for putting on such a wonderful match. Tomorrow we shoot at Riley.

I went down to the range and shot at 25 and 40 on a rest and from my hand. All of them in the A and not grouping like they were yesterday. XRE...please explain parallax

Ok I'm back....after a 12 hour night shift and 4 hours of sleep. This work thing is really getting on my nerves! Trigger control: I have a long flat trigger. I've not been having a problem pushing the gun left with this gun. OK it is like me to shoot a charlie to the left on the second shot. Trigger pull coming out of recoil might be a problem...but first shot on target usually always an alpha. Also..the gun shooting off a rest was exactly as it was shooting out of my hand. If it IS the way I'm pulling the trigger...I AM CONSISTENT. AND if I'm that consistent.... I say adjust the gun to fit the way I shoot. Scope Mount and Screws: Yeah, I was all over that. I had the 40 cal open gun screws fall apart so I knew to look at this. The scope appears to be centered with screws intact. Looking at the gun before adjusting the scope....the set screws were in the same location as when I adjusted them 3 weeks ago. So it did not look to me that the set screws became loose causing the problem. Adjusted the heck out of it: The screw was set to point at 1 oclock. It appears I have moved it to the 4 or 5 oclock position. That seems like alot to me. Especially since I sighted the gun in 3 weeks ago at 1 oclock. The ammo: I'm on a new lot of powder and I have received more bullets. However, I don't know when I started using this lot of bullets. I'm going to have to coordinate with Dave to assess this further. I have not changed components. Montana Gold bullets 124 gr, Starline super comp brass, VVN350 powder, Winchester small rifle primers. The barrel and comp: I've looked down it and I do not see any obstruction. The bullet holes are perfectly round with no odd shape. I've seen key holing on bullets that have hit a comp. Slide and Frame: Looks intact to me with no evidence of damage. I think I may need to video tape so you can see what I'm talking about. The problem is I've got time issues! We are shooting tomorrow in Owensboro and tonight I've promised some quality time with my son. I remain confident in my shooting ability but I'm starting to get a little nervous about the gun.

At 40 yards on a rest 2 1/2 inch diameter circle. At 25 yards not sure..don't have the target. But I do recall shooting a group at 25 with 4 out of 6 shots touching each other out of my hand.

#22 continued I grouped a tight group to the left in the charlie zone off of a rest at 40. I'm shooing classic targets. This is consistent with where I was shooting it out of my hand. I'm confused Why would I be dead center at 25 and not at 40?? Like I said..up and down I can understand. Anyway, most of my 250 rounds were shot for sighting in the gun. Then I shot some steel runs to build my confidence back up. Focus of practice was getting the gun sighted in and realizing I'M NOT THE PROBLEM! It's a shoot till you puke weekend. Dave and I will be doing a match on Saturday and Sunday. Staying loaded continues to be an issue. I would have shot more rounds today...but I need them for the weekend.

We both know the box wasn't going to matter You were "on" and I wasn't. #22 250 rounds Went to the range to figure out why I wasn't hitting steel. Put the gun on a rest and found it to be shooting WAY left!! Adjusted the heck out of the sight. So much so it concerns me. Anyway, gun is now sighted in at 25 yards. Can shoot it from the rest with a dead center A and also out of my hand in the A zone. Perhaps this explains my steel woes on league night. However, I'm a little confused about something. I steped back to 40 yards and did some group shooting and found that the gun was shooting WAY left. Nothing on the sight adjustment changed. So I steped back up to 25 yards and I was back in the center of the A. If I aimed at the right hand stick of the target at 40 yards I was dead center A. Now I understand shots will hit high or low at different yardages....but I'm confused why I was so far left at 40. Trigger pull?? I don't think so but I guess the only way to truly tell is to put the gun on a rest at 40 and see what I get. In fact...I think I'm going to go do that right now. I ran out of bullets or I would have done it when I was at the range. Be back later to report.. and to summerize the rest of my practice.

#23 League Night 270 rounds I changed my recoil spring back to 9 lbs. That took the bounce away. I shot poorly on steel. I don't know why. I'll figure it out on Thursday when I have a range day by myself. All around....not a great night. I'm trying to practice living in the present. Didn't do a good job with that. I was thinking about a huge work project that was due today. I hate it when life gets into my shooting Not great...so what....move on.

HE NAILED THE CLASSIFIER!!! It was an awesome run. You are getting better each time out. It's amazing to watch. Keep up the good work.

#25 Atlanta Match Coach, Chun-Yu and I had the opportunity to assist a squad of new shooters through their first match. Everyone has to have a first match and I was glad we were there to lead them through. We had a DQ (dropped loaded gun, landed facing up range), some fingers on the trigger while moving, and some close 180 breaks on the first stage. It was a good day to wear my brown pants. However, after that first stage, things settled down somewhat and a good time was had by all. I was pleased that my gun ran well with no problems. My focus wasn't "on" as I had 3 mikes for a 5 stage match. I was sloppy. I wanted to cut loose at this match but it just wasn't there today. I've learned to respect the match for what it is. Today wasn't the cut loose day. I didn't like the way I felt today shooting. I decided to come home and put at least 200 rounds down range. I wanted to end my day with a good feeling....which leads us to #24 #24 300 round practice I practiced some of the elements I didn't think I performed well on today. I really focused in on my gun. I've got a violent dot right now. I like a snappy gun but this is a little much. I still have the 12lb recoil spring in...the 9lb is on order. We found a 10 lb one I'll be putting in tonight. I think that might help. I've also opened a new lot of VV350. It's time to chrono to see where I'm at. Here's the breakdown of rounds fired: 200 rounds on a 20 round stage that required movement and had steel 60 rounds from behind a barricade with a reload in the middle 40 rounds of 2 reload 2 at 10 yds Tomorrow is league night. Focus will be stand and shoot.

That's why they call it a diary my friend. I'm glad my last post was meaningful to you.

This is a tough story to tell but I'm choosing to do so to encourage other women who are also making this journey. My Body Image Journey "Girls with Guns", "Women with Guns", if you did a google search you would be very surprised at what you would find. There are many pornographic images out there of cartoon like women with large breast, small waist and big hips with guns strapped to them. If that doesn't float your boat, you could look at the Dillon Catalog models or the SVI girl and admire their sex appeal and beauty. I certainly have been guilty of the later. The image of sex appeal coupled with women and guns is a hard image to shake. The truth is I haven't really wanted to shake it. My desire has been to fulfill it. I think most women want to be considered beautiful, and powerful. It's not a bad thing. The trouble comes when one can not match the ideal image that has been pressed into our brains as beautiful and powerful. This ideal image along with a childhood wound has crippled my shooting and I would like to share my journey along with the resolution I have finally arrived at. I carry my weight around my waist. When I put a gun belt on it greatly enhances that figure flaw. In my attempts to dress my body in the most attractive way I've gone through many wardrobe dilemmas. Here's a summary of my wardrobe woes: • 2003 Just showed up in jeans and a tee shirt and shot • 2004 I saw that all the good shooters had team shirts with their name on them. I desperately wanted one. I got a STI shirt and placed my name on it but felt EXTREMELY uncomfortable wearing it because I didn't feel like I deserved it. Who was I to have a STI shirt with my name on it? • 2005 Since I was uncomfortable in team sponsored apparel I went the other way. I wore skorts. They were figure flattering and I felt like a woman. The trouble was I felt like a woman. I felt out of place. I stood out. It was as uncomfortable as wearing a STI shirt I didn't deserve. • 2006 This was the year of the low wasted pant. The gun was lower on my waist which was good. The pants made my torso look longer which made my body look more balanced. However, my gut still hung over my belt and my mags would sometimes fall out when I moved quickly on field courses. • 2007 This was the year to find the perfect shirt. I bought tech wear shirts as well as tee shirts made of polyester fabric. It didn't matter. My breast still seemed extremely large and when coupled with my waist cinched up with a gun belt I presented a portly figure. I fixed part of the problem by wearing 2 bras when shooting. • 2008 I haven't bought a thing. I'm wearing pants that are one inch below my belly button that I have had for the last 5 years. I do this because my mags stay on my belt the best there and it also cuts my torso in half giving me the appearance of a more slender body. I wear a brown, blue, or a black collared shirt with sleeves. I do this because it's the most slimming and sweat and rain can sometimes cause a see through effect with a lighter shirt color. Dark colors minimize this. Although I've made peace with the wardrobe issues over the years, I've still struggled with my image on video. It has hurt me to view my body on tape. I see my tummy. I see my large breast and it disappoints me. I say to myself, "That's not who I am". The image on the screen is not who I am. I am beautiful. I am powerful. My outer shell isn't reflecting who I am on the inside." And this has been my pain that I've chosen to live with. I've chosen to look at myself through a looking glass that has the Dillon catalog models as the standard. In October, I took a train into Chicago to see a show with my niece and sister in law. On the way home I was riding the train just thinking. I was thinking of XRE actually and his crossfit training program. I was saying to myself, "I'd like to get fit like him. I think that would be an awesome challenge. I want to get slim and beautiful." It was then that I heard a voice in my head say, "Who told you you weren't beautiful?" And at that moment in my mind I said, "I did" and my mind flashed to the exact moment in time when I made a deal with myself. I was 13 years old at the county fair. I was looking around at all the other 13 year old girls. They had nice clothes, and the boys were chasing after them. No one was chasing after me. It was then I decided that was fine with me. I was just going to be me and the rest of them could have the clothes and the boys. I wasn't going to compete. I don't know why women do this but we do. We judge ourselves and compare ourselves to others. I've learned over time that this is wrong. I've known this truth in my head for a LONG time, but it's just recently that I've finally gotten it into my heart. My body does reflect who I am. My varicose veins say, I've walked a hundred miles up and down hospital hallways taking care of the ill. My cellulite says, I'm not afraid to have an ice cream cone with my boys. My large sagging breast say, gravity happens so deal with it. My tummy says, I've got a project for you when Nationals is over. You can focus on me after that big event in your life and that focus will keep you from having anti-climactic depression. The wrinkles around my eyes say, you've laughed your way through life. My sun damaged skin says, you've lived your life out doors in the sunshine. My body does reflect who I am and I'm OK with it. I'm not a girl with a gun. I'm not a sex symbol to be admired. I've said this before and I mean it….when I put that gun on I'm not a woman, I am a shooter. That is the image I choose to embrace. It's that image that allows me to shoot with complete freedom. I'm not bound to the expectation of what a girl with a gun looks like. I'm only bound by my love and passion for a sport that fulfills me.

#26 Getting Loaded The Ball range is on a "cease fire" order by me until Sunday night. Our town festival has begun and out of respect for the good people of the community I'm choosing to keep it quiet around here. Therefore, I made this session all about re-loading. I loaded around 500 tonight and have 200 on the shelf. I've got another 100 I'd like to load tomorrow. I'll say it once again, staying loaded is the biggest challenge in putting lots of rounds down range. I'll have opportunity to shoot all that lead very soon. I'll be shooting a local match on Sunday, league night on Monday, practice seesion on Thursday, match in KY on Saturday, match at Riley on Sunday. This upcoming week is going to fun and it will be interesting to see if I continue to pick up momentum. I've made a little break through on something I've been working on mentally. I'll be writing about it soon. I've very encouraged because I'm starting to feel the freedom again. Confident, comfortable, and freedom. My oh my.... I LOVE to shoot when I feel those things in my pocket.

THANKS DOUG!! It was good to shoot with you. #27 League Night Awesome league night. My brilliant husband put together some stages that were very fun to shoot....3 field courses (which we shot twice) and a short steel speed shoot. He set up a stage with walls where you go side to side, then down a hallway, and finish at a half wall. We did this stage twice that way and then we reversed it and did it backwards. We started down range and moved backwards down the hallway, finishing side to side. This is the type of shooting I love the most. FUN!! He put a bunch of steel, a swinger, and a clam shell in there just to keep us from running too fast Good stuff! I once again had a little gun trouble on the first run. I have a new recoil spring #12 lbs. I was running a #9lb spring. Why the change? Because that is what Dave put in the gun, that's what we had, we couldn't remember what pound the spring was etc... I like the way it's shooting. However, the safety seems to be popping up a fraction during fire and I've NEVER had a problem with that before. Are the two related??? I'm also wondering if the gun is short stroking because of the increase poundage of spring?? I do NOT have a shock buff in there. Probably not but I'm wondering. The gun was running perfect...and now it has hic-coughs...and the only change is that spring. SOOOOO I'll be ordering a #9 lb spring and putting that in there to see what happens. As far as performance, it was much better. I'm starting to get my open rhythm back. I can see it on video. Chun-Yu helped me video last week's league night (which was awful) and then I have the South Central Match (which looked more like myself) to League Night this week (which is almost where I need to be but not quite) The tape from this week's league night had some technical difficulties. The camera worked for the first stage and then it started beeping. We thought it was taping but at the end of the day the first stage was the only one on tape. It was kind of disappointing because there were some really positive things on that tape. Oh well. I appreciate ALL those involved in league night. My hubby for setting up and designing great test of skill. My brother who fixes my gun and encourages me. Chun-Yu and Nathan for showing up, helping, and being all around good guys Coach...my speedometer and training partner...he keeps me on pace and exercises me mentally I'm very lucky to have such a "team" around me. Thanks guys. Next league night is Monday night. It will be a stand and shoot theme. I'm loving the padding taped into my glove It's helping my wrist and my grip. If I can get the spring thing worked out...I think I've got the gun where I want it. I'm very comfortable and it feels good. I can shoot well with comfortable and feels good.

#28 South Central Match I did something I don't normally do at a match. I went alone. The family went to church and I went to shoot. It was difficult for me to leave my family but Dave and I talked about it and came to the conclusion that this was the right thing to do. He is 100% behind my shooting and I could accomplish very little without him. It turned out to be a real blessing to me. I was able to shoot with some good friends that allowed me to just focus on the shooting. I shot a clean match. I had one hic-cough when I hit my safety by accident causing the gun not to fire. OOPHS! Other than that is was smooth. The gun felt great. My brother did an awesome job taking the sharp edge off my gun. I also added padding (using duct tape) to the inside of my shooting glove. This is the same padding that I tried taping onto the grip. I like the solution. I'm getting tendonitis in my left wrist and the little bit of padding I added makes it a little more ergonomically correct. I needed that match to get back on track. I'll be shooting again next weekend with the same intent of focusing on the shooting. Training in Fear I have a confession to make. For the last 2 August leading up to Nationals I have trained in fear. In 2006 I spent at least 2000 rounds shooting activators and swingers in an attempt to become more confident. I was fearful of things that moved. In 2007 I was STUPID and shot an open gun most of the season and then 6 weeks before Nationals picked up a limited gun and expected to do well. Needless to say that didn't work out. I've felt fear come into the picture again this August. Fearful that all my hard work will not pay off. Fearful that I'm not training right. Fearful that I'll get injured and all will go down the tube etc.... I decided yesterday that I'm not going to train in fear any longer. BTDTGTT I'm choosing to do something more courageous and not cave into the fear. I told Dave yesterday I could go to church and cry about what I'm suppose to do, or I could go do what I know I'm suppose to be doing. I'm done crying. I'm done second guessing. I'm done with the fear. I'm moving forward with confidence. I've released myself from any expectations of performance at Nationals. I'm simply going to shoot with the love and passion I have for the sport. That's all this is about anyway.....love. I'm going to continue to dry fire and shoot my 1000 rounds a week, but I'm doing it out of love not fear. There's a BIG difference between the two. When warriors went to battle their armor was in the front. As long as they were moving forward they were protected. When they turned to retreat, that's when they were exposed to getting hit by the enemy. I'm not turning back. I'm moving forward. League night is tomorrow. I don't think I'll do a double practice because I think that hurt my performance last week. Mr. Ball will be joining us this week.

That sure is a nice way to put it. Overall it was a rough night for me. I couldn't get my head where I needed it to be for some reason. That and I need to keep dryfiring. I haven't had much time or energy for it this week. It will come. Be patient. Keep moving forward and doing what you can. Each week you are getting better. I'm leaning towards hallways and activators for Tuesday's league night. See you there.

Coach I think what you meant to say was....Happy Birthday

#29 League Night Calamity Jane gets spanked on her birthday by Coach! Well done Coach! I didn't perform well tonight and you did. I got the spanking I deserved. Tonight's theme was ports, walls, and barrels. We shot around walls, through ports and barrels. We also did Merle's Standards, Big Barricade, and a bill drill at 50 yds on a steel plate. Good practice session. My brother brought his dremmel and worked on my gun. I no longer have that sharp edge that has been bothering me. He also gave me an AWESOME present. He got me a new handle for my Dillion loader. I currently have the handle with the ball on it. This new lever is easier to grip and pull down. THANKS BRO!! You're the best I have ice on my knee and my left wrist. I hurt. The full day of shooting has taken its toll on my body. It was a good birthday. I rejoice is living another year, and having friends and family that love me. I look forward to another year of life.

#30 390 rounds Warm Up 25 yd group shoot Progression Drill @7 yds (par time 2.7 sec) Draw and shoot one shot to 7 yd target in 2.7 sec, Draw and shoot two shots to 7 yd target in 2.7 sec, continue progression up to 6 shots Near to Far Speed draw to 3 yd target, transition to 20 yd steel 3 paper/ 3 steel Paper at 10 yds, steel at 15yds, work drill both ways 2 reload 2 at 7 yds Drill Work Classic Target Drill Go here to see what this drill is: http://re-gun.blogspot.com/2007/11/standar...r-practice.html String 1 53 pts/ 120 String 2 66 pts/ 90 String 3 83 pt /105 String 4 71 pts/ 90 String 5 143 pts/ 150 String 6 107 pts/ 120 String 7 150 pts/ 150 Total pts 673pts / 825 81.5% of the points This is the day I'm doing two practices in one day. I've got league night tonight so I'm going to use that as my "context" practice. My 50 yd shooting was not very good today and that puzzles me. I realized today there is a BIG difference in standing and group shooting at 50 yds (which I'm good at) and drawing to a 50 yd target with a par time. I was able to achieve most of the par times that the Classic target drill imposes. I was VERY close to the goal and therefore did not impose the time penalty on myself. It's my birthday and in a society that "leaves no child behind" and where self esteem is more important than achievement, I cut myself some slack. Difficult to keep within the par time: 2 shots on A,B,C at 15 yds in 3.0 sed 2 shots on C at 10 yds in 1.5 sec 2 shots on B at 7 yds in 1.3 sec My draws are weak right now. I've got a "hitch in my giddy up". Clearly, there is evidence that I need to do some dry fire work. We are going to shoot Merle's Standards tonight and I DID NOT PARCTICE it in this session. I want to shoot it fresh. After my poor long distance shooting today...I'm a little concerned. I'm off to clean my gun and case gauge bullets before league night begins.