[Which is Harder - Overcoming Gobbling or Making GM?]

Last weekend I shot my ninth - or was it tenth? - USPSA match. It was raining, so two of the five stages got cancelled. My goal was just to call my shots and shoot alphas as fast as my sights returned on target, but on the second stage I got two light strikes and my plan completely fell to pieces, and I resorted to shooting at the targets instead of focusing on shooting each one, and then the next...

In all I had three light strikes in under 80 rounds. I've replaced my striker, cleaned my striker channel, and replaced my light spring with a stock spring. My gun functioned perfectly for ~250 rounds, but now I'm getting light strikes again...

I learned from that experience that when I make a mistake or encounter a malfunction during a stage, there is nothing I can do to regain the time I've lost (I just shoot worse by trying to shoot faster), so I might as well carry on as though it didn't happen. That's a good lesson for gobbling, too. The last few days were gobbly, but there is nothing I can do to un-eat those truffles,* and I don't do better in life by lapsing into a spiral of self-loathing, so I might as well carry on as though it didn't happen.

* Throwing up your food is a really bad idea, for all sorts of reasons.

My good friend Matt recommended an excellent book, Living the Japanese Arts & Ways, by H.E. Davey. There's a section on beginner's mind where he talks about the interesting phenomenon of people getting worse, not better, with practice. Here's Davey:

When we first copy a work of art, it's new. Our reactions to what we're attempting to reproduce are also new, and so are our successes and problems with the particular tehon. But as we continue to copy, layer upon layer of the past piles onto the current moment, making an accurate perception of what we're really looking at, and what we're actually doing, difficult.

I've been realizing that the quality of my dry-fire isn't as high as it could be. Not just that I don't do the most effective mix of drills (though that's probably true too), but that it's become rote and repetitive. I pay a LOT of attention when I live-fire because I have so little practice ammo, and it's a real treat. But dry-fire I do almost every day, sometimes as I'm cooking, talking to Max, or singing along to Drive-By Truckers (or whichever artist I'm currently playing).** And I get into habits, especially with mag changes. It's a real trick/balance to learn from experience (time is necessary for getting proficient at any skill) while still remaining open to one's present moment experience.

I think that my dry-fire can be a lot more productive if I pay attention to it in the same way I do to live-fire.

** "The Three Great Alabama Icons" is my current dry-fire song.

[Which is Harder - Overcoming Gobbling or Making GM?]

From today's thankful email:

3) making a breakthrough in my mag changes (?). I've been re-working my technique for what feels like forever (in actuality, more like a month). First I learned to reacquire my strong hand grip properly (I'd been letting my right hand slide down after a reload, and every millimeter lower you hold the gun, the less control you have over recoil/muzzle flip), then I learned to instinctively keep my index finger outside the trigger guard/along the frame, then I practiced bringing the gun down and towards the center of my body as I "flip" it to hit the mag release... All good changes and necessary, but ahhhhh.... I was getting so sick of doing a mag change ever again.

Then this morning I re-read the part in Brian's book about mechanics only existing for you to go beyond them, and not to get bogged down in the "do this to get that." There was a part he said that just clicked with me: "You can mechanically map it all out, but when it's all said and done, the most important thing is that the arm is relaxed... If the arm just floats back there relaxed, it's amazing how the magazine goes right in."

I'd been trying and trying to get my reloads, but they were so inconsistent. Sometimes I'd nail them, and other times I'd botch them, and I'd started to approach (especially standing) reloads with a sense of dread, like, "I wonder if this one will be smooth..." But if I just relax, and see the mag well and let the focus lock the mag in, it's so much easier. It just happens.

The realization reminded me of when I was a beginning shooter and having the hardest time keeping my weak hand from slipping during recoil. Everyone was telling me to grip harder, I was gripping harder and harder and my hand was still slipping, and then Jeremy saw me shoot and said, "You're way too tense. Feel how little strength it takes to stay with the gun." He had me shoot the gun a few times with my weak hand barely cupped against my right hand, and it stayed there; and then I switched to my normal grip and tensed up again, and it slid off! But now I remember and can find the feeling of keeping my wrists flexible whenever I need to...

Anyway, mag changes are very similar (I think). I need to relax my right arm the angle it naturally tilts, and just look the mag into the gun.

4) Brian and Jeremy (and Donovan, Andy, and Bo) for teaching me about shooting!

[Which is Harder - Overcoming Gobbling or Making GM?]

Thanks for the footwear suggestions, guys. I will route them to the appropriate channels. Donovan - I've drop kicked mags across the apartment in my bare feet. It doesn't hurt that much.

Last night was an uber mega gobble. I know I've made progress since moving to Arlington - I used to gobble 5-6 nights a week, and recently I've had several six or seven day strings of no gobbles (though this last string was only 3). But it doesn't change the despair, self-loathing, sickness, and anger I feel the next day.

It's hard to remember that there will be times that I will be so glad that I never ended it all the times that I wanted to.* When I finish the book that I want to write, when I shoot 85-90% at major matches, I will be so glad I didn't listen to the voice that says, "You don't deserve this." "You don't deserve to be good/win." "Think of all the people whose main obstacles are outside of them."

Donovan keeps telling me that the ability to handle frustration is the single most important factor in changing myself and mastering any skill. He's right. This is just one of those many, many, many frustrating times.

Maybe someday I'll grow out of chasing big goals. In The Black Cauldron, Adaon tells the glory-hungry young Taran, "Is there not glory enough in living the days given to us? You should know there is adventure in simply being among those we love and the things we love, and beauty, too."

* Don't worry, I won't act on it.

[Which is Harder - Overcoming Gobbling or Making GM?]

Jim - LOL. Ando says I am the only person he knows other than Andrew Tuohy (Vuurwapen blog) who wears sandals while shooting. I figure that I wear sandals all the time everywhere (I hiked Half Dome in these sandals), so I'll probably be wearing them if/when I encounter a situation where I need to shoot back.

I actually don't find that I have any less traction in sandals than I do in running shoes. But yeah, I'll probably upgrade to cleats someday...

[Which is Harder - Overcoming Gobbling or Making GM?]

Jim and Steve - I'm working on it!

Shot a USPSA match at Summit Point, WV, yesterday. I didn't have any brain freezes, zero misses, and 3 D's over 6 stages. I shot more C's than I would have liked. When I started competing in USPSA, I was super slow and shot all A's because I waited for a perfect, stopped sight picture on every target. Then I realized how close most of the targets in matches were, and how little of a sight picture I could get away with, and now it seems I'm forgetting to use a more precise aiming method on harder targets, especially mid-long range open ones. (Somehow a far target with hard cover or no-shoots triggers the part of my brain that wills me to aim.)

Here's video from two of the stages:

Things I need to work on:

1) consistent mag changes (sigh... this is a perpetual one)

2) aiming and breaking a shot sooner - you can see this especially when I reach the first far position in stage 2 and when I come up on the first target of the third array in stage 6. I can see that target through the soft cover, too!

3) drawing in a straight line to the target without slowing down - Chris pointed out that I stop when my weak hand joins the gun.

4) transitions - Andy pointed out in my last video that I let the gun recoil before transitioning to the next target. I need to shoot the next target as soon as the sight starts to lift off the first.

5) shooting around barricades and from awkward positions. I didn't upload video of this stage because it gives me a headache to watch the extra shots I took at steel from around a barricade, but yeah... I need to dry-fire shooting from funny angles more.

6) setting up in a position so I don't have to shift my feet to hit all the targets

7) weak hand transfer after a reload

[Which is Harder - Overcoming Gobbling or Making GM?]

Tim - Yeah. You already know this, but Max and I visited the Holocaust Museum in DC this weekend (it's very well done and I highly recommend it), and one of the thoughts that crossed my mind was, "Wasting time is less bad than productively doing evil."

Jim - Thanks!

Tim (toothguy) - Thanks for the reminder.

My friend Russell accidentally left his camera running and recorded

at the match two weekends ago. (I'm on 1:27 to 1:40.) I got decent hits and shot a 65% classifier, but I lost a ton of time on the reload. Andy and Donovan gave me some very helpful tips on what to improve, but if you see anything else, let me know!

I've been dry-firing a lot of reloads. And it feels like I'm constantly re-working my technique. It took me two weeks to learn to instinctively keep my trigger finger flat along the frame, and now I'm working on bringing the gun in a straight line from firing position to where it receives the new mag.

Arg. Well, onward!

[Which is Harder - Overcoming Gobbling or Making GM?]

Tim - Excellent points re: the history/lore and being around people who are skilled with their hands.


I'm still alive. And still shooting (getting back into it). My ankle is 95% healed. I shot a match 2 weeks ago where I DQ'ed (again!!) for having my finger in the trigger guard during a mag change and accidentally firing. I worked hard on my mag changes in dry-fire and now subconsciously keep my index finger flat against the frame. My mag changes are smoother and closer to subconsciously competent, too.

Last weekend I shot my first full USPSA match since Richmond. I had a lot of fun and learned a lot, even though I didn't shoot especially well.


A while ago, Fr. Richard (a good friend of our parish priest, Fr. Nathan) gave a homily that I remember. He preached on Luke's narrative of the miracle of the loaves and fishes, when Jesus feeds 5,000 people with 5 loaves and 2 fishes. Fr. Richard pointed out that when Jesus asked the disciples to give the people something to eat, the disciples looked outside of themselves and protested that they could not buy enough at the store to feed so many people. They forgot that infinite good was already present to them.

Like the disciples, I often focus on my (perceived) lacks:


"I don't live-fire enough." (I average ~100 rounds/week, and that's including matches.)

"I don't know the right people, and when I do, they don't..."

"Am I making progress towards writing good and lasting things that will affect/change/touch people?"

"I waste so much time."*


and I forget, "Esther, you have everything you need. The kingdom of God is with you, within you."



* One thing I love/appreciate about history is that studying it gives me perspective. Sometimes I find it so hard to forgive myself for the time that I've wasted thinking about gobbling, planning to gobble, gobbling, recovering from a gobble... I think, "Champions don't do this. People whose lives are dedicated to something good don't do this." But then I think of even more horrible things that have happened - like armies laying siege to and slaying entire cities, like the Mongol warriors building towers of skulls - and I believe that all of these things can be redeemed, so that has to be true of me despite my failings and faults as well.

[History and evolution of practical shooting]

ChuckS - Thank you!

PowderFinger - Yes that occurred to me too, but I'm not sure how to search the forum for file type.

From correspondence with a friend with whom I am bouncing ideas:

The big question that's been brewing in the back of my mind is, how do I write a history of practical shooting that is interesting to more than just the small set of people in our small sport who are interested in the history of it? How do I tie developments in the practical shooting scene to the history of firearms, combat, and defense at large, and to the goings-on in the U.S. and world at the time? At the same time, many of the stories and personalities are intrinsically interesting, and I want to capture something of the heady spirit of the early days, as well as the spirit of experimentation that guys like Brian and Rob were a part of in the 80's.

My favorite historians - Thucydides, Donald Kagan, Anthony Beever - take facts and weave them into stories that have larger themes but are still accurate. And they don't overdo it on the relevance. For example, Donald Kagan doesn't say, "The splitting of ancient Greece into Athenian and Spartan factions resembles the splitting of the modern world into the American and Soviet blocs." He draws immediate connections - how the aftermath of the Pelopponesian War ended the Golden Age of Athens and left Greece vulnerable to Macedonian takeover - but he also lets the story speak for itself because he assumes (and respects) that history is relevant.

It may be that the maximum possible audience for a history of practical shooting is shooters who are directly interested in it, but I think - at least, hope - not.

[History and evolution of practical shooting]

Powder Finger - Thanks!

Early IPSC'er - I just talked to Mark Keefe at American Rifleman (the guy is super nice and amazingly knowledgeable about firearms history), and he also suggested I interview Janelle Cooper.

We also had an interesting discussion on why people are interested in firearms and shooting history and how to make such an account meaningful.

[History and evolution of practical shooting]

Early IPSC'er - Thank you for that very helpful pointer to look further back in the history of IPSC. Tremendously helpful post. And thank you for the names and backgrounds of people that I should read about and contact.

Update: If anyone has photos from the early days of practical shooting, I'm interested in those as well!

[History and evolution of practical shooting]

Steve RA - Thanks! It will be informative. I hope it will be interesting as well.

Tim - Thank you for getting me thinking along these lines in the first place! I would love any and all reading suggestions and thoughts/ideas.

[History and evolution of practical shooting]

I'm writing a history of practical shooting with input from top shooters (current and former), as well as some of the RO's and regular shooters who have been around the sport for a long time. I think it's really neat that a lot of the legends of practical shooting (Brian, Rob, Jerry...) are still around, and it would be a shame not to get their perspectives before they pass (though may top shooters live forever ). Unfortunately, Jeff Cooper is no longer around, but many of the shooters he trained and shot with are.

I'm interested in the evolution of the sport, the institutions, the culture, the techniques, and the gear. I'm also interested in the "so what?" of practical shooting. How has experimentation in the sport affected technique in the military, law enforcement, and defensive shooting?

I need help with:

1) suggestions of people I should talk to (if you can connect me or are that person, even better!)

2) books, essays, interviews, etc., that I should read

3) your perspectives on the evolution of the sport. If you've been around a while, I want to hear what has changed and which changes you like and despise. (Yes, I've read Brian's "The Degeneration of American Sport.")

4) stories and anecdotes

5) any other suggestions or ideas

Feel free to PM or email (epkann@gmail.com) me too.

Thanks!!!

[Nimitz's Journey To Shooting Greatness]

I don't see why you shouldn't be able to make GM at over 50. Rob Leatham and Jerry Miculek are both over 50 and shooting like GMs, to say the least.

Glad you're seeing results from your training changes. Keep us posted on your training and match results. Good luck!

[Which is Harder - Overcoming Gobbling or Making GM?]

Jon - Awesome! "Broke into the wrong goddamn rec room, didn't ya bastard?"

Tim - Looking forward to hearing your thoughts.

Steve - 1) . 2) Camaraderie is a great way to put it. I think it's that, as well as the people per se, that I'm drawn to.

With my ankle injured, I figure this is a good time to work on stand and shoot skills. A couple weeks ago, I tried Brian's eyes closed ninja exercises for the first time. I was pleased to discover that if I assumed a perfect grip, I could pivot in any direction and have my sights show up in alignment. Today I tried doing the same thing from draw.

When my sights weren't aligned, it was almost always because my grip was off, which often happened when I was tense. When I relaxed and tried to imagine myself as the eye of the storm, or like Brian drawing and firing two shots like he was strolling in the park, I got my sights aligned almost every time.

I've been paying close attention to form (e.g., getting a perfect grip on every draw, reacquiring a perfect grip after every reload). It's slower now but hopefully will make me faster in the long run...

[Looking for ranges around Arlington, VA area]

I just moved from California to Arlington, VA (yay free state!) and am wondering if anyone knows of good ranges where I can practice USPSA-style stuff and/or ranges that host USPSA, steel, action pistol etc. competitions?

Thanks!! If any of you guys are in the VA area and want a practice buddy, I'd be up for that too.

[Which is Harder - Overcoming Gobbling or Making GM?]

Tim and Steve - Thanks for the suggestions!

Jon - Ouch. Hope yours is good as new now.



My friend Bo posted on Facebook about what he loves so much about guns and shooting. He wrote: "They're a complicated dance of pure simplicity."

It made me think of what my answer would be. Here are my top reasons, in no particular order:


1) Improving is REALLY fun, perhaps the most fun thing ever.

There are few physical limitations to shooting well. You don't have to be strong*, fast, or even especially coordinated. In shooting, it seems, you can be as good as you decide to be.


2) the people. Less than six months into practical shooting, I've already met so many smart, friendly, and/or helpful shooters, some of whom I hope will become lifelong friends.


3) is very similar to Bo's answer (though perhaps interpreted differently than how he intended). Shooting starts out complicated and becomes simple as you improve.

I love that all the hard work, attention to trigger press, transitions, movement, draw, grip, open up/give way to moments of pure shooting. I'm a total novice, and I can't say that I've experienced anything remotely like what Bo, Andy etc. have experienced - and I think they'd tell you that they're a ways off from experiencing what Eric, Vogel, etc., experience regularly - but I've tasted a hint of a hint of it.

As T.S. Eliot writes in "The Dry Salvages":

For most of us, there is only the unattended
Moment, the moment in and out of time,
The distraction fit, lost in a shaft of sunlight,
The wild thyme unseen, or the winter lightning
Or the waterfall, or music heard so deeply
That it is not heard at all, but you are the music
While the music lasts. These are only hints and guesses,
Hints followed by guesses; and the rest
Is prayer, observance, discipline, thought and action.

You give so much for those few, fleeting, and unpredictable moments that feel like pure gift.


3 rephrased) Shooting is (or can be**) artistic.

Borrowing a metaphor from Brian, I'm learning the vocabulary, the grammar, the punctuation of shooting, and in a few years (I hope) I'll start using them for creative expression.


4) Shooting is badass. Who doesn't want to be like Burt Gummer in Tremors?

What do you love about shooting?

* You have to be stronger than I am, but not (I think) stronger than I can be.

** I'm sure different temperaments experience shooting very differently. I'm not obsessed with guns or technique, and I enjoy competition; but for me the art is primary and the competition secondary. Not that I'm particularly good at either yet.

[Which is Harder - Overcoming Gobbling or Making GM?]

David - Showoff. But yes, that makes sense now. Thanks!

I finally got my ankle checked out by a sports medicine specialist yesterday. The doctor said it was good that I went in when I did, because otherwise I might have needed surgery and a lot of rehab. Basically, I have a lot of inflammation where my Achilles tendon meets my heel. There are three main tendons that connect there, any of which could be injured; or, it could be a bone issue. (I need to wait until I get to Virginia to have imaging done.) In any case, I need to immobilize the ankle for 6-8 weeks. She gave me a big boot ("a cast for your ankle") to wear in the meantime.

[Which is Harder - Overcoming Gobbling or Making GM?]

Jon and Tar - Lol, I wasn't fishing for compliments but thanks!

Donovan - THANKS!!!

Stage 5 - I noticed the gun dropping at :08 too and wondered if it would not have been better to transition straight across with arms extended. Not sure what I did with that reload either, but I'll try not to do it again. (I flip the gun to hit the mag release with my right thumb.) I agree that my reloads need to be much faster and subconsciously competent so as to free up brain space to focus on movement.

I've noticed that with my shooting pace too. Like you said, I think it has to do with how fast I can call shots and control recoil right now. As what I need to see to make and call each shot changes over time, and as I learn to transition faster and control recoil more effectively, I'm hoping that my speed will naturally increase and correspond more perfectly to what each target requires.

Stage 1 - What do you mean by "turning your body... instead of walking backwards?"

Tim - Thanks!!

[Which is Harder - Overcoming Gobbling or Making GM?]

Aglifter - Thanks for the info and suggestions. Yes but we'll be moving to Virginia, so I'll be able to practice with real guns.

Jon - I saw the chickens at Richmond!



Yesterday I DQ'ed in a match for the first time. I was doing a reload while moving left and back and broke the 180. I've learned my lesson.

Even so, I had a fun time. David drove out from Modesto to shoot my last Richmond match in a while (I'll be driving across the country to Virginia in a week), and I got to see my friends Kit, Ken(s), Manny, Kenny, Kevin, and Andre; and make new friends Lori and Tim.

I also shot two stages about as well as I can currently shoot.

Here is video from yesterday.* Please feel free to comment on anything you see me doing right and/or that I need to improve. Thanks!


Stage 5:

34 rounds, down 3 B's and 2 C's.

I took 4 shuffle steps getting from the start position to where I could shoot my first target and moved way too deep into the first port instead of going in a straight line to the corner array. I was happy with how I mostly kept moving through the last straightaway and made up a shot in the last array right away. I need to be able to do my mag changes in 1-2 steps and be ready to shoot immediately after.

Stage 1:

17 rounds, down 2 C's and 1 D (but 1 C and the D were on a disappearing target).

I was happy with how I shot the disappearing target immediately as I came around the corner. I was also happy with how I indexed on the last 3 steel instead of waiting for them to fall, though watching video my shots sound a lot slower than they felt! Backing up I shifted my feet before shooting steel, and eventually I want to be able to shoot as I'm backing up. It looks like I lowered my right hand a lot for the mag change.

* Originally, I was going to wait until I had lost weight and made A class before posting video, but the possibility of improvement overrides vanity.

[Which is Harder - Overcoming Gobbling or Making GM?]

David - It definitely is. It is always a huge pain in the butt to drive out to practice with you, but worth it!


Well I had two good practices with David this week! Our first practice, I wanted to work on transitions. We set up two USPSA targets at 10 yds and gradually moved them farther apart. We then put a dueling tree with 6" plates in the center and shot 2 paper, 1 steel, 2 paper. I had one run with all A hits with a 1.31 draw and .24 splits (I forget what the transitions were.) Overall my draws and shooting were faster without getting terrible hits.* Even David said he noticed that I had improved a lot since the last time we practiced. That meant a lot and made me very happy, especially since I've barely gotten to practice at all since then.

Today we worked on distance change-ups and accuracy. We set up paper targets at 7 yds, 15 yds, and 25 yds. My splits weren't far off of David's (hundredths of a second), but my transitions were a lot slower (tenths of a second), especially my transition from 7 to 15 yds. (I think because the shift from a target to front sight sight focus is harder than the shift from a front sight to more refined front sight focus. And I'm just not that confident yet in how much of a sight picture I need to hit A's at medium distances.)

So I can gain a lot of time if I improve my transitions.

Somehow I re-injured my ankle. It hurts a lot and annoys me.

* I always sacrifice accuracy somewhat when I practice with David, but it's helpful because my instinct is to be slow and accurate. Chasing David's times helps me to push the pace until the wheels fall off.

[Which is Harder - Overcoming Gobbling or Making GM?]

Tim - The 147 recoil definitely feels softer. The timing feels different, too. My favorite ammo so far have been the lead bullets that David's loaded for me and the competition rounds that Jeremy loaded and let me try in my first match. (I'm guessing both were 147g, but not sure...)

Steve - Thanks!

A line that I copied into my notebook a long time ago is: "The work to be done called for this life." (I'm not sure who said it.)

I don't know if people have specific destinies, in that things have to happen one way that is already decided, but I do like the idea of everything in one's life preparing one, if one allows it, to give in a way that one wouldn't otherwise be able to, that no one else is qualified to do.*

I've been following the work of Gary Taubes and Peter Attia, and both of them have qualifications, skills, and experiences that enable them to contribute greatly, and uniquely, to the nutritional sciences. They are doing the kind of excellent, not-yet-done work that, if I were in their field, I would want to be doing.

I often pray that the experiences I am having - especially the painful ones - will one day allow me to make a similar contribution. For example, a lot has been written about addictions from a neuroscience, biochemical, clinical, socio-cultural, personal/memoir, and philosophical/theological perspective. A lot of people are doing very good work that helps many who are suffering. But I haven't yet come across anyone who integrates an understanding of addictions (and specifically, food addictions) across all those different perspectives.

Furthermore, no one (to my knowledge) has yet done a thorough meta-study of which treatments work, and to what extent, and under what circumstances. To my understanding, Alcoholics Anonymous is held up as the gold standard of recovery programs, even though we don't know how it works (is it the community? the surrender to a higher power?) or what percentage of people it works for (it's hard to gather statistics on a group that is, by definition, anonymous ). All we know is that many people testify to having stopped abusing alcohol through AA (i.e., all we know is that AA has worked for at least some people).

But what about the people for whom AA (or rehab, or cognitive behavioral therapy, or whatever) didn't work? What was different about their situations? And why do we import the AA model of recovery to all addictions (for example, Overeaters Anonymous - OA - is based on the same model of abstinence, even though food is not a substance that can be abstained from!) and/or without re-thinking its theoretical underpinnings (for example, many churches offer addiction recovery programs that are basically "12 Steps plus Jesus")?

Not to mention, no one other than Dunnington (that I am aware of) tries to give an account of what addiction is, and why we see so much of it in modern societies. There is still so much that we don't understand and haven't asked.

I don't know if that is (one of) the specific work(s) that I will do. But visioning such scenarios/possibilities helps me to bear moments like this, when I have mega gobbled for the nth thousandth time and am tempted to give up hope and feel like a big, fat banana slug.**

* Max sometimes notes that I am very teleological, that I look for the purpose in things instead of just seeing them as they are.

** Not that there's anything wrong with resembling a banana slug, especially if you are one!

[Which is Harder - Overcoming Gobbling or Making GM?]

Not much shooting lately. Just got back from apartment hunting in Virginia (but was staying in DC, so no dry or live-fire ). But I will get to shoot one more match at Richmond before going away for a year.

Excerpt from an email to Max:

I went to Reed's and live-fired for the first time since shooting the match on the 16th. I ordered 1,000 rounds of reload 9mm's in March that finally arrived yesterday morning, so I brought those rounds to the range. At first all of my bullets were hitting high, and I couldn't figure out why -- I was sure I must have WAY deteriorated, or forgotten how to aim, or my sights had shifted, or something. But then I thought, this is the first time I'm shooting groups with 147-grain, flat-nosed bullets (not sure if the shape makes a difference or not); in practice with David, I shoot whatever I can find, but we're shooting at USPSA targets so I don't notice small accuracy differences. But at Reed's, I think I've only ever shot at a 3" circle with Miwall reloads or Blazer Brass, both of which are 115 or 124g bullets. I had the idea to buy 1 box of Blazer Brass from Reeds, and immediately, I got center hits at 10 yds, 15 yds, and 20 yds. (I shot a nice WHO group at 15 yds that was all in the 10-ring, and freestyle at 20 yds I had all in the 10 and most in the black.) So clearly my aiming and sights weren't off, and I didn't suddenly suck. Then I switched back to the 147g, and immediately my hits landed higher again. It wasn't a huge difference - at 10 yds, they were still all in the 10 ring and extended from the top of the black sticker to the border of the 10 ring; at 15 yds, the group was about 1" higher than it would otherwise be; and at 20 yds, the group was about 2" higher.

I was surprised that the heavier bullet weight grouped higher, because I would have thought the heavier bullet would go more slowly and therefore drop more over distance. But I Googled and learned that heavier bullets impact higher because they travel through the barrel more slowly and hence leave the gun at a later point in the recoil cycle, when the gun's muzzle is more elevated.

Now that I know what a big difference bullet weight and load can make to point of impact at different distances, I'm going to make sure to sight in my gun for whatever match ammo I'm using!

[Which is Harder - Overcoming Gobbling or Making GM?]

Tar - Thanks!! That is really kind and encouraging of you.

Tim - Thanks, I appreciated the insights you shared in your letter a lot.

Yesterday I shot a USPSA match at Oakdale (my fourth USPSA match and second at Oakdale). I'd been getting mixed hits in practice and matches since starting to push for speed, and yesterday I just tried to get my hits. I succeeded for the most part and had mostly A's, no deltas or mikes, and about a dozen C's. The first stage went really well - I shot 32 out of 32 A's about as fast as I can currently shoot. But I think I could have shot the classifier (steely speed vii) and the last stage (32 rounds on hoser targets) more aggressively and still gotten my hits.

I shot 66% of the Production winner. That is a big improvement over the 57% that I shot at Richmond the last match and the 55% I shot at Oakdale two months ago.

Things to remember: 1) In stage breakdown, look for the most efficient path to get to where I want to go. Deviating from a straight line to get closer to targets is probably not worth the time it takes. 2) Don't take longer than I currently need to get my hits!

[Which is Harder - Overcoming Gobbling or Making GM?]

Tim - What do you work on in practice?

Gary - Thanks! I agree about 2 1/2 hours for an afternoon nap.

So the big news is that I'll be moving to Virginia for a year starting in July. Max is finishing up his first judicial clerkship and has one more before we move back to California.

If you've been following my blog, you can probably imagine that this move brings up a lot of uncomfortable themes for me. Prioritizing my husband's career and moving across the country for it, and being almost 30 and without a "real" career track of my own, are not what I envisioned. It's funny because I don't regret dropping out of or turning down any of the safe, respectable careers I could have chosen. And we're lucky that I can write and shoot from (almost) anywhere, because that means Max and I can be together no matter where his job takes him, but at the same time it's a blow to my feminist ego to not have my career that Max sacrifices for too.*

I am also learning a lot about what it means to put Max's and our marriage's needs above my own, and to trust that my dreams will be taken care of even if I don't prioritize them above everything else.** Or rather, I am learning how much I don't know and need to practice.

* Of course, Max sacrifices for me in lots of ways, not least in enduring my angst as an artist. (I suspect that I, like many artists, am more lovable than I am livable.)

** It's like switching to a target instead of a front sight focus and trusting that you will still get your hits, and more effectively.

[Which is Harder - Overcoming Gobbling or Making GM?]

GuildSF4 - . I'm glad you remind your wife of what a good job she does in loving you!

Tim - Thanks for sharing that. I've been pondering why it's easier for me to accept where I'm currently at while striving for much more in some areas than others (for example, I don't hate myself every day for being a C shooter when I want to be much better; I just try to do something most days to improve. On the other hand, I find it very hard to tolerate being 20 pounds heavier than I used to be.* Sometimes I think, "I cannot stand living in this prison of adiposity for one more day!"

But that would be like saying, "I can't accept shooting at my current skill level. I want to shoot like Mink tomorrow!!!")

On Friday I had a great practice with David in Oakdale. We practiced shooting around barricades and shooting the Texas star while moving sideways.

David always looks really relaxed while he's shooting, and I realized from imitating him that I don't need to crouch excessively while shooting on the move; I can just walk normally with knees bent and shoot.

Today I shot my third USPSA match and came in top C in Production. Overall I was happy with how I performed - I programmed the stages well and tried to let my sights dictate my speed. I shot more C's than I would have liked but had only 1 D and 2 misses (one at a target three yards away - yikes! ).

Up to this point I've spent the vast majority of my scarce ammo in practice rather than in matches, which I think was wise, but at this point I think I could use a lot more match experience. Encountering and breaking down different match scenarios, programming stages (which I did better today than I've done before but could improve vastly on - I thought of how the part of top shooters' brains that is devoted to 3D visual representation must be highly developed), seeing video of myself shooting and learning from it, are things I need.