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Gun shop experts and their quotes


Sarge

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My nephew got a 1911 for his birthday a few years ago. He rounds up Uncle Sam and away we go to Casper to find a holster and some mags. We're in one of the big sporting goods chain stores looking at a wall full of pistol magazines when the expert behind the counter comes down to advise us. "Can I help you guys?" "Yeah, you got any Kimber magazines for a 1911?" (Remember we are seriously studying a wall rack full of magazines.) Expert looks puzzled. Then, "maybe", he says, motioning for us to follow as he walks 50 feet down the gun counter. We get to the cash register and he whips out a nice glossy magazine with a pretty Kimber 1911 on the cover. (I bit a hole in my cheek trying not to laugh.) My nephew is looking at the guy like he's from New York City or something.

Having no idea what to say to the guy, I finally mimed a tap-rack-bang for John Browning. Finally, a glint of realization in his eye. "OH, you mean CLIPS????"

I involuntarily cringe and quickly try to assess the value of explaing the difference between a clip, a magazine, and a copy of Combat Handguns.

(Nah, I decide. Don't go there!)

"uh.....yeah.... clips....do you have any clips for a 1911?" (Gint of realization has faded from John Brownings eyes by now.)

Nephew: "Like a Colt Government Model.45?"

I don't think we have any right now. If we do, they will be on that wall down there.....

:roflol::roflol::roflol:

From the other side of the counter, I worked in a gun store in Hobbs, NM. At least once a week someone came in and asked

"Hey, you gotta clip for a nine millimeter"?

Me (or one of the other employees): "What kind?"

Customer: "A nine millimeter."

Me: "Do you know the make or model?"

Customer: :mellow:

Me: "Do you know who made it? Or can you tell me the model number?"

Customer: :mellow::unsure: They look at each other (these guys always seemed to come in packs of two to four) " . . . It's a nine millimeter."

Me: "Do you have the gun with you? If you bring it in, I'll look at it and see if we have a magazine for it. If not, we can probably order one."

Customer: "A what?"

Me: <_< "Do you have the gun with you?"

Sometimes they'd leave and come back. Sometimes they made a phone call. If they left to get this information, there was an almost 50% chance they'd come back with the serial number, but no make or model. (Sometimes we could figure it out from that, sometimes not.)

Sometimes the customer said: "No. It's in Mexico."

Me: :wacko: "Ok. Next time you're there, or if you can call someone who can look at it, write down who made it and what it's called, the model name or model number. I can probably find a magazine for it if you get me that information."

Customer: "That's what you put the bullets in? Cause that's what I need."

Me: :blink: "Um . . . yeah."

The other common one was people who wanted bullets. We had a lot of customers who bought reloading supplies from us. We had customers who came in wanting bullets, who we knew dang good and well they really wanted factory ammunition. Sometimes, if it was someone we knew, just to yank their chain, when they asked for bullets, we got them bullets. If you got a :unsure: it was priceless.

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Browning only makes shotguns? :o This I did not know.....Must another Browning that makes the BAR, Hi-Power, and Buckmark...I'm sure it must be another one who designed the 1911.... :cheers:

ROFL Now that there is funny, I don't care who you are. :roflol:

Joe W.

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Actually, no. It's way too wide. In the original 1911 design, the "wide" slots on the grip screws (as opposed to the "narrow" slots, much less hexheads, we so see on so many 1911 grip screws today) were perfectly sized so that you could use the rim of a round of .45 ACP to remove the grip screws if that became necessary in the field. Okay, I find it hard to imagine a situation in which that would be necessary (and you trash the cartridge rim in the process - I say that as someone who's actually done it, just out of curiosity to see if it would actually work, and it did) but it just shows how seriously John Moses Browning and U.S. Army Ordnance took that whole "detail strip totally without tools" thing.

This I did not know. I was told, and be aware that we don't have huge gun culture here, that the slot was big enough to use the front of the magazine bottom plate to undo the screws, never tried either. I have 9million screwdriver sets so I just spend 2 hours looking for the only one that fits and is where I left it, not where I can find it. :wacko:

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On "clips". The local Remington Distributor calls magazines, "clips". THIS DRIVES ME NUTS!.

So one day the owner of that company and his "brilliant rep" were in the shop and I handed him a "clip" it was a piece of bent metal with 5 rounds hanging out of it and a magazine for a rifle, and in my best R Lee Ermey voice, I went, "one is a clip, one is a mag, one is for rifles, the other for fags"!

The shop was full and I mean full. I think he gets it now.

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Well Remington distributer doesnt know better bless his heart , but haow about this one from a company that should,

TruBore S2 integral compensator/ bull barrel, full length guide rod, checkered front strap and mainspring housing, front and rear serrations, and mounted OKO Reflex or C-More Railway sight make this the most economical Open CLASS ready gun on the market today.

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Helped a buddy out at his shop and had plenty of memorable quotes. The best one ever was a guy came in with some POS jennings,byco or the like that wouldnt work. He looked at it and said basically he couldnt fix it because he couldnt get the parts for the gun, if the guy could find a part somewhere he could put it in for him. Guys remark "I knew I should have saved up and bought a hi point"

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Helped a buddy out at his shop and had plenty of memorable quotes. The best one ever was a guy came in with some POS jennings,byco or the like that wouldnt work. He looked at it and said basically he couldnt fix it because he couldnt get the parts for the gun, if the guy could find a part somewhere he could put it in for him. Guys remark "I knew I should have saved up and bought a hi point"

:roflol::roflol::lol:

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  • 4 weeks later...

Was at the local gun shop and an older fellow came in with a Remington 1100. He said that it must have been out of gas cause it won't ejaculate. Shop owner took the shotgun into the back room and started his air compressor, took gun down, changed the O-ring, oiled it, and came back out and charged the guy for a refill (price of O-ring). The old guy left happy as could be.

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Was at the local gun shop and an older fellow came in with a Remington 1100. He said that it must have been out of gas cause it won't ejaculate. Shop owner took the shotgun into the back room and started his air compressor, took gun down, changed the O-ring, oiled it, and came back out and charged the guy for a refill (price of O-ring). The old guy left happy as could be.

If he was able to make it ejaculate, he should have charged more than the price of an o-ring! What a deal!

Always good to hear a story with a happy ending.

-rvb

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This is the first time I read this board and its already my favorite. So I'll add mine all from the same gun store in Long Island NY.

Me: How are you I'd like to look at that 1911.

Owner: Can I see ID

I pull out militayr ID, NJ drivers license and NJ Firearms ID card.

Owner: I wont take it out, I cant sell to you

Me: Sure you can you will just have to transfer it to my FFL in NJ.

Owner: Oh yea I could do that.

Me: So can I see the 1911

Owner: I cant let you handle the gun since you dont have a license i will lose my business and you will go to jail for possession of a firearm. I know I'm a retired cop.

Me: Thats wierd I just gace you my credentials ok so am I supposed to pay have it go to my FFL and you will take it back if I dont like it.

Owner: No you already bought it, its out of my hands at that point.

Me: So I have to buy something I cant handle till the transfer.

Owner: yea people do it all the time.

Me: Really I guess i'll take your word for it. So I'll look it up myself, what 1911 is it?

Owner: Springfield.

Me: I know but what kind?

Owner: 1911

Me: I know but what model?

Owner: A1

Me: I know, maybe I'm not being clear. what version of Springfield's 1911a1 is it there are variations of 1911 due to different features.

Owner: No there isnt its just 1911. theres no variations to a 1911 or else its not a 1911 you are talking about.

Me: Oh really I did not realize that I'll make sure I do more research before I buy a gun next time.

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Same store same day. after I gave up on the 1911.

Me: So do you have anything in 7mm WSM?

Owner: What do you need that for?

Me: Because I want it, but its for 1000 yard competition.

Owner: Why would you use something that big? everyone uses .308 for that anyway.

Me: Really? I thought .30 caliber was bigger that 7mm's .28 caliber.

Owner: Everyone around here uses .308 ask any of the big winners.

Me: Well most the big winners are using 6.5x.284

Owner: Where are you getting this misinformation?

Me: You're right, I just came back from Iraq last week where I took plenty of long distance shots, I must be losing it.

Owner: Anyway there isnt a call for that kind of stuff here in Long Island we cater to hunters mostly, and this is Shotgun area.

Me: Oh in that case do you have a Savage Slugwarrior?

Owner: Whats that?

Me: Its a bolt action shotgun.

Owner: No such thing.

Me: I'm sorry to waste your time. bye.

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Yep, I like them there Glocks and Les Baers and all but my Hi-Point is my go-to SHTF heater.

:sick:

A customs agent I knew said to me. "our department is going to g-locks, they are good guns"

lets see if i can type how it came out, GEE-Locks.

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you're a better person than me :mellow:. and yea, you let him off waaaay too easy on all occasions.

i think ill swing by a local shop this weekend and play around with them to see what i hear. im in need of a good laugh

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I was at a big box retailer that sells guns here in Texas picking up a new bottle of solvent, when I heard the most insane conversation between two customers.

It was two men, and one was selling the other on the virtues of the Taurus Judge. "It shoots shotgun shells! You don't even have to aim! It will blow a door off its hinges! It's the greatest self defense gun ever!" And so on.

The customer saying all of this nonsense was practically shouting - you know, one of those ultra-confident loudmouths who wants everyone to benefit from the pure genius of his spoken words. I was benefiting all right, but more from the humor of it.

I thought about speaking up, and at about that moment I made eye contact with the salesman who had been dead silent up to this point. I gave him the, "Can you believe this crap?" look, and he gave me the "Don't you dare ruin this sale for me" look.

I kept my mouth shut, grabbed a bottle of Hoppe's, and went to the check out counter to get the hell out of there.

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Browning only makes shotguns? :o This I did not know.....Must another Browning that makes the BAR, Hi-Power, and Buckmark...I'm sure it must be another one who designed the 1911.... :cheers:

Actually, Browning the company did not produce the BAR (which has not actually been in production by anyone since the 1950s) or the Hi-Power. I'm not even sure they "make" the Buck Mark - or shotguns either, for that matter. Browning the company is primarily, if not completely, an importer, not a manufacturer. They get in guns made by other companies and sell them under their own marque.

Also, while I'm not making a case for the guy being quoted here, he was talking about Browning the company, not John Moses Browning the arms designer, so I'm not sure where the "designed the 1911" comment fits in.

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Browning only makes shotguns? :o This I did not know.....Must another Browning that makes the BAR, Hi-Power, and Buckmark...I'm sure it must be another one who designed the 1911.... :cheers:

Actually, Browning the company did not produce the BAR (which has not actually been in production by anyone since the 1950s) or the Hi-Power. I'm not even sure they "make" the Buck Mark - or shotguns either, for that matter. Browning the company is primarily, if not completely, an importer, not a manufacturer. They get in guns made by other companies and sell them under their own marque.

Also, while I'm not making a case for the guy being quoted here, he was talking about Browning the company, not John Moses Browning the arms designer, so I'm not sure where the "designed the 1911" comment fits in.

Party pooper ;P

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Was at the local gun shop and an older fellow came in with a Remington 1100. He said that it must have been out of gas cause it won't ejaculate. Shop owner took the shotgun into the back room and started his air compressor, took gun down, changed the O-ring, oiled it, and came back out and charged the guy for a refill (price of O-ring). The old guy left happy as could be.

If he was able to make it ejaculate, he should have charged more than the price of an o-ring! What a deal!

Always good to hear a story with a happy ending.

-rvb

He said "happy ending" :roflol: :roflol: :roflol:

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Was at the local gun shop and an older fellow came in with a Remington 1100. He said that it must have been out of gas cause it won't ejaculate. Shop owner took the shotgun into the back room and started his air compressor, took gun down, changed the O-ring, oiled it, and came back out and charged the guy for a refill (price of O-ring). The old guy left happy as could be.

If he was able to make it ejaculate, he should have charged more than the price of an o-ring! What a deal!

Always good to hear a story with a happy ending.

-rvb

He said "happy ending" :roflol: :roflol: :roflol:

With an "O-Ring"! :roflol:

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me: "do you carry any .22 conversion kits other than the ones you have made by kimber?

gun counter guy: "kimber is the only mfg who makes .22 conversion kits"

me: "okay, thanks for your help".

to this stores defense, most of the people there are excellent. they went through a massive hiring when our new president was elected due to the increased volume of customer. i think the application process went something like this. "can you spell gun?" okay excellent, you start tomorrow.

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