Calamity Jane

[Calamity Jane]

The guys that win HOA at big matches - they've achieved something similar, mentally, to the Navy Seal. They believe they will win, utterly and completely. Even if its a "false sense of bravado", they believe it. They've done the work, physically, mentally, and spiritually, to allow themselves to believe. They've surrounded themselves with positive people who support that vision of themselves. They've entered the contest believing that, ultimately, they will succeed.

How does belief differ from expecting to win?

[XRe]

How does belief differ from expecting to win?

How does "doing" differ from "trying"???

I know, I know, it seems contradictory... I think understanding the difference between doing and trying, though, has the key to understanding this difference, as well. It shows up in how the person deals with not "winning" in the aftermath, too... Do they take stock, shake it off, note the lessons learned, and move forward? Or, do they bask in their self pity for a while, feed themselves with a bunch of negative self talk, then redouble their efforts at winning?

The difference, as I understand it, is that "belief" (in this case) implies trust, experience and relaxed confidence, born as the result of "doing the work" and learning the skills. Expectation, on the other hand, implies a sense of entitlement and a certain sort of tense/tight stranglehold on "making it happen". I've experienced both - but I admit, its not easy to describe the difference in words, though they feel distinctly different to me. The stuff above about how a person might handle the situation stems directly from my experiences with this one, for what its worth...

[Calamity Jane]

How does belief differ from expecting to win?

How does "doing" differ from "trying"???

I know, I know, it seems contradictory... I think understanding the difference between doing and trying, though, has the key to understanding this difference, as well. It shows up in how the person deals with not "winning" in the aftermath, too... Do they take stock, shake it off, note the lessons learned, and move forward? Or, do they bask in their self pity for a while, feed themselves with a bunch of negative self talk, then redouble their efforts at winning?

The difference, as I understand it, is that "belief" (in this case) implies trust, experience and relaxed confidence, born as the result of "doing the work" and learning the skills. Expectation, on the other hand, implies a sense of entitlement and a certain sort of tense/tight stranglehold on "making it happen". I've experienced both - but I admit, its not easy to describe the difference in words, though they feel distinctly different to me. The stuff above about how a person might handle the situation stems directly from my experiences with this one, for what its worth...

How do you keep the two apart? How do you keep doing away from trying and belief away from expectation? What is the force that keeps them apart?

[XRe]

How do you keep the two apart? How do you keep doing away from trying and belief away from expectation? What is the force that keeps them apart?

Attitude. (beneath which underlies many of the mental game skills, BTW - remaining positive with the self talk, a positive goal setting program, remaining in balance, etc).

[jedb]

Winning is a by product of most of the things mentioned in some of the latest threads. Training on the proper techniques, mental conditioning and practice. You can train to win battles but the war or being best in the world is most times out of our control.

[Nik Habicht]

How do you keep the two apart? How do you keep doing away from trying and belief away from expectation? What is the force that keeps them apart?

Doing vs. Trying: Flowing through the stage, noticing everything, triggering the gun the moment you see what you need to see on each target, with no thought or expectation --- just being vs. trying to run the stage in x seconds, trying to shoot all Alphas, trying a risky approach to a portion of the stage....

When I've shot my best --- there was no trying, there was no sense of time or points or good or bad, there was simply target acquisition, seeing, releasing the striker, reloading --- and during one memorable early experience with doing, clearing 2 jams -- effortlessly.....

Shooting my best is a lot like driving a car at the peak of personal performance.....

I don't like the use of the word "believe." I have nothing to base this on in practical shooting --- but I think "knowing" is a better word. Not knowing that you will win --- but knowing that if you perform at your best, and if you maintain consistency, that the win is possible. That knowledge comes with experience, and is supported by a ton of hard work and attention to detail. (That approach is based on focusing on what you can control --- your performance, consistency, equipment. And it allows you to dismiss what you cannot control --- that someone else might be able to do it faster or more accurately or both, consistently enough to snatch the win.)

So here's the question: Do you want to win the match -- or do you want the flawless performance, the one that you can't improve on that given day, the one that might be good enough to win, if no one has a better day?

[Calamity Jane]

Xre is on the money as usual. The mental game is the key that unlocks many doors.

I want to go back to my ladder analogy. As review, the sides of the ladder represent the training plan and the work of training, the rungs represent performance achievement, and at the top is the win (whatever that may be). The base of the ladder rests on the ground representing my fundamental values. Sitting at the top with the win is my pay value. But what moves one up the ladder?? It takes more than performance achievement to move up. It’s the ones who can climb the ladder they built each and every time they compete who have the best shot at making it to the top on game day. So what moves one up the ladder? The mental game. It’s the mental game that allows us to hang on to what we have already achieved and to continue on to achieve more. So my next question is. How do you train the mental game?

Positive self talk, goal setting, etc are all parts of the mental game, but I want to go deeper. All that stuff is elementary stuff…it’s mental baby food. It’s simply not enough. I’m looking for meat and potatoes. There is more and I’m going to find it.

You want to know someone who has “more” than positive self talk and goal setting going for them? Kay Clark Miculek. I have had the opportunity a few times to watch Kay compete. I LOVE to watch her. When she takes the playing field there is no doubt that she is there to win. Her body language screams resolve. She consistently climbs the ladder she has built and only when she gets to her tippy top rungs does she show any weakness. Lisa Munson is the same way except her body language doesn’t scream it like Kay. I went to ladies camp back in 2004 and I watched these two play ping pong. No matter what they do they are in it for the win. The intent to win, the will, the resolve, is more than positive self talk and goal setting. How do you train intent, will and resolve???

Do you get what I’m trying to say? I want to get beyond the cookie cutter mental management systems and find the real heart of it. The place where few people find because they settle for something less. I want more.

[XRe]

How do you train the mental game?

The same way you train anything else. Identify weaknesses, make a plan to strengthen them, execute the plan, move on to the next weakness. For instance - I don't have a lot of experience keeping my head on straight in the midst of super squad at big matches. One of my mental game goals for this year is to get on the super squad at each match I attend and learn - what it feels like, how my self talk starts to work, what are my strengths and weaknesses in those scenarios, etc. As I identify strengths, I'll note them and lean on them - and the weaknesses, of course, I'll start working on. Getting my GM card was an enabling goal to be able to pursue this one

Positive self talk, goal setting, etc are all parts of the mental game, but I want to go deeper. All that stuff is elementary stuff…it's mental baby food. It's simply not enough. I'm looking for meat and potatoes. There is more and I'm going to find it.

My experience is that the mental game works much like the physical shooting game. This would not appear to be the answer you're looking for There's not a magic set of skills that you learn later - instead, in my experience, I gain a deeper understanding of what those basic building block skills mean to me, and how powerful they truly are. I also learn to actually employ more of the basic building blocks of the game at one time as I go. This is why I tear apart my mental game every so often, as well as my physical game - I get ideas on how to improve that part of game, as well.

The cool thing about this, though, is that I've realized several times over that I already have the answers - the questions seem to change, the ways the questions arise change, but the answers (both in the shooting, and in the mind game) always seem to come back to doing the basic job at hand.... If you will - the journey always seems to return home...

How do you train intent, will and resolve???

You prove it. In short, you follow through on the goals you set and show yourself that you're serious about it. You invest in your success. As you continue to do that through the good times, and the hard times (especially the hard times - when you just don't feel like practicing, or shooting that last stage of the match, or....), you begin to realize that you can persevere, even through the challenges, and that yes, you really meant what you said.

Intent is worthless. Intent is writing down a set of goals and leaving them on the table. Intent means nothing without action - it only gains power when you follow through on it, and prove that you are invested in it.

Will and Resolve are really two sides of the same coin, aren't they? They are much like Respect - they are earned (or lost) through action. When you take the actions that say "yes" to your intent, you start to gain (or, really more correctly, realize) Will/Resolve. This includes things like staying balanced in your life. When you choose dry fire practice over flopping on the couch, you're banking some of that energy for later, when you need it to drag you through a performance that you can't seem to get into. This isn't a perfect analogy, but....

I'm using my understanding of "Will/Resolve". There's another form of it, that I would really call false bravado that's really more of a form of bragging or falsely pumping oneself up. That's more of a house of cards, ready to be blown over as soon as its discovered for what it is.

What differs between everyone is how much of "the work" needs to be done before they realize a level of determination that they can actually use in a real way. Some folks seem to have this nailed down very easily, and some don't. I tend to think that this is a skill like any other, and some of us are better than others at it - just like some folks seem to pick up a fast draw, or fast splits, quicker than others.

Do you get what I'm trying to say? I want to get beyond the cookie cutter mental management systems and find the real heart of it. The place where few people find because they settle for something less. I want more.

Then go get it

[mjbine]

Jane,

I like this winning topic. I will come back to this and soak it all in.

[Calamity Jane]

Do you get what I'm trying to say? I want to get beyond the cookie cutter mental management systems and find the real heart of it. The place where few people find because they settle for something less. I want more.

Then go get it

You response reminds me of one of my favorite lines from a recent TV show I watched. It's making me smile.

I have a confession. I'm addicted to the CMT TV show "Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders: making the team 2" I'm guilty! I have watched it every week and I watched last season also. My 15 year old son doesn't seem to mind watching it with me either I love the contrast between the 20 something young skinny girls and that of 40 something Kelli Finglass the director of the Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders. Kelli is beautiful, strong, powerful, smart, and clearly the boss. Then you have the cheerleader "girls". Let's just say not all of them are as smart and confident as Kelli. I enjoy seeing the older woman triumph each week. Through my eyes she makes those young girls look so..what's the word....undeveloped. I doubt you boys see it the same way I do.

Anyway, for those of you who watch you know that following the DCC is the Fat Cheerleaders as my husband and I call them. Ok it's really called "So you want to look like a high school cheerleader again" or something like that. It's basically a combination between the DCC and the Biggest loser. I enjoy watching drill sergeant Jay put those girls through grueling military style workouts. This leads me to my favorite line from a TV show.... On the first episode of Fat Cheerleaders one of the girls was not giving it her all. Jay had her mind all figured out and was calling her out on it. She was on a bike and not really peddling as hard as she could. He said things like, "You're afraid of this." "This scares you to death". She starts arguing back with him how she is not afraid of HIM. He then asks her "Why are you here?" and she says, "To better myself" and he shouts at her in drill sergeant form "Then better yourself!" His meaning was to get to work and start peddling. It was AWESOME! She ended up quiting that night. He had her number which was FEAR. He called her out on it and she walked. Isn't reality TV great!

So XRE's comment reminded me of that. I will have more. I won't quit.

[Coach]

Wow! Lots of good stuff here. I have been wanting to chime in but cannot find the time.

I am going to try and find it Saturday and make a post.

[Calamity Jane]

Wow! Lots of good stuff here. I have been wanting to chime in but cannot find the time.

I am going to try and find it Saturday and make a post.

I was wondering where you were??? I can't believe you didn't comment on my addiction to the DCC! I was pretty sure you would.

[Coach]

I have no knowledge of the DCC. Some of the people that live with me watch it but I don't.

My spare time has been taken up with historiography and the ERA's failure at ratification and I am not out of the woods yet. There is a vindictive professor trying to take her frustrations out on me. She wants a pound of flesh but I am jsut giving here hamburger.

I have to go back and re read about two pages to jump in here.

[Coach]

CJ,

I have started to post no fewer than three times and have yet to get it done. Thanks for the complement.

Winning is finishing at the top of the score sheet, and winning is also showing improvment and getting better. People can mean enitrely different things when they say winning and each of those meanings can be correct. you could spend years in this sporting getting better all the time and never win a big match, and will have likely as not won in the big picture.

I want to win that way, but I want to win the matches and the big matches as well. I think you do too. I know that you are capable of winning bigger matches than I am.

Mental toughness and the mental game can be trained for just as winning can be trained for. If you practice the skills of this game that will get you in the door. You have to be able to do all of the mechanics, you have to be able to plan a stage, call shots and on and on. I think that is pretty hard stuff but I think it is the easier part of this sport. The tougher part is the mental aspects of performing when it is all on the line against the very best and getting the job done. Finishing ahead of the people we know we have to beat at a big match. Being able to perform under pressure.

You have to have been there and done that in order to perform under pressure. The trick to pressure is to just concetrate on the stage at hand and focus on doing the mechanical things right. Winning will take care of itself at that point.

I have always been able to throw a near great performance out from time to time. I venture on knowing that I have yet to live up to my potential and am capable of bigger and better. Sometimes that requires more convincing that others. I think the positive self talk that many big time shooters refer to is important but at times I wonder if they over do it. For example, if the phrase don't miss mentally spoken is that powerful then it is a wonder I have lived this long. But I know they are right about convincing ourselves that we can accomplish something. Wether we think we can or we cannot we are right.

I think it is important to look at old scores where you have done well. Beaten people that you should not have beaten on paper, and beaten them not because they screwed up and had six mikes or procedural but because you shot a better stage. Sometimes even failure can breed confidence. I finished third at South Central last time but shot well enough to win. I shot down a popper with five shots instead of call for calibration. We both know I don't have light loads and the shots were in the circle. That extra time cost me 35 points and I lost by 29 or 30. I should have done the smart thing and not shot down that popper. I have learned that lesson and I know how well I shot the whole match. Next time. Next time I will be a little smarter and I Know I can shoot to that level again it was not a fluke. I know it.

Hope some of this helps.

[Calamity Jane]

Thanks for the reply Coach.

I've said that RLP or Coach as I call him is one mentally tough dude. It's true. There is only one time I've seen him a little shaken and I've got the moment on video. It is HILARIOUS to me. It happened at the Illinois State match. His gun broke on the second stage...bomar back sight lost a screw. Anyway, I insisted that he shoot my limited gun. I kept telling him switching guns was a state of mind. So we went to the safety table...I cautioned him on the extremely light trigger...he dry fired a few times and we went on to the next stage. The next stage was sort of like shooting in the old west. It required a lot of running down a board walk and across a "street". Seeing Coach run with this unknown gun with the light trigger is PRICELESS! It was like watching a buffalo sized man try to be dainty. It's one of those things where you had to be there. Even now I'm laughing. Ofcourse after that stage...he did great with the gun.

OK here is the question of the day...WHAT IS MENTAL TOUGHNESS? What does that mean?

It's sort of like defining winning. You think it is an obvious easy answer...but once you try to nail it down....it's a little difficult.

So what is it? What does it mean to be mentally tough??

[j1b]

Mental toughness is simply something that allows you to do what you need to do.

You find yourself entered into a competition where if you tie your shoe in less than 5 seconds you will win a million dollars. Mental toughness is that thing that eliminates the million dollars (the magnitude of the event) and assures you that you're just tying your shoes.

J

[Coach]

Mental toughness is the ability to proceed desipte pressure or adversity. Mental toughness is not getting too upset by set backs or failure and not too happy about success or winning. The ability to go on just because you have decided to go on not because things are well. Mental toughness springs from being stubborn, determined and persistant.

Mental toughness is a basic requirement for life. Without it you won't last long without being sheltered by someone else.

Here is a question can mental toughness be developed or do you either have it or not?

[XRe]

Spot on, guys. Mental toughness, to me, is a quality that arises from the development of your mental "tool box". Its part will and attitude, part mental management skills, and part the experience of putting the two together. In some ways, its a sort of "mental callous".

What Jack says is very to the point - your ability to block out the extraneous distractions that come up during competition, and simply do your job in the present tense. RLP brings up several key ways mental toughness helps do that for you - eliminate the roller coaster ups and downs mentally and emotionally; that quality of stubborn, tenacious will to continue - sometimes at all costs. A few practical examples I might add - the ability to refuse to let other people or things "rent space" in your head; shrugging off a poor performance and returning to a solid performance on the next stage; being able to use adversity to your advantage (or at least prevent it from becoming a detractor); being able to step up to a stage knowing that something big is on the line, and tuning it out; etc, etc....

Mental toughness, in my opinion, is most definitely a skill (or skill set) that can be learned and taught. Like any other, some folks are naturally better with it than others. The one thing that must be there, though, is the desire and will to succeed. Without that internal energy to draw on, the rest doesn't really matter. Also, at least in my experience - toughness comes at the expense of suffering, much like physical and emotional toughness do. I've had to work at it, accept my failures and learn from them, and go out there willing to do my best again, even if I get some more lumps or bruises along the way - and continue to learn and grow from those failures.

My favorite way to work on toughness skills at local matches?? Find a buddy or two who's on the same path, and play a game with them. Some kind of side bet or something - just enough to make you pay attention, but the bragging rights are the thing. You should all feel free to razz each other throughout the match, talk trash, etc - because doing so not only puts pressure on them, but also on you (because it will be returned tenfold if you blow after delivering a ration of crap). Everyone should agree ahead of time to keep things positive, and not take it personally - you're all working on a common goal, and are friends, right? You'll experience the gamut of feelings, even when nothing "real" is on the line, and you'll learn to ignore the BS and focus on what matters - and also learn a little bit about defensive mental game strategy while you're at it. There may come a time later when someone you're competing against will purposefully try to get in your head - how do you handle that?? How do you twist their parlay to your advantage, and turn it around on them? You'll also learn to recognize how much smack people talk - even when they're not trying to talk smack - and what forms that stuff can take, so you can just ignore it later.

[Calamity Jane]

Mental toughness is the ability to overcome.

For me, mental toughness is the ability to overcome that which causes me pain and fear.

I think pain and fear is the common denominator in most situations that have a need for mental toughness.

I've got more to say about this...but I was called into work this morning...so I'm out the door...later.....

[Calamity Jane]

Train to the Pain

I had a personal trainer a few years ago who was addicted to pain. He was the son of an emotionally abusive mother and living with that abuse first made him an alcoholic and then later on a fitness fanatic. He told me the story of how he changed his life in one day. He lived in Florida at the time and was working as a waiter in a fine restaurant. He made a lot of money but would spend most of it on drugs and alcohol. Anyway, he got fired from work one day(never been fired before), came home to the apartment where he was living with a girlfriend, the girlfriends dog bit him (still has the scar today) and that was the straw that broke the camel's back. He packed his bags, had just enough money to buy a plane ticket home, got drunk on the plane, called his Dad to pick him up at the airport, Dad came and got him, he moved home, stopped drinking and changed his life.

What inspired me most about working with him was his ability to push himself through pain both physically and mentally. When I was training with him he was running marathons. He mastered marathons so he decided to start running ultra marathons. He ran a race once that required him to run for 24 hours straight. He was able to push himself when everything in his body was saying STOP. I'm sorry but that is mentally tough! Pain has become his friend.

What does this have to do with me? I don't train to the pain. When I say train to the pain I don't necessarily mean train to the point of hurting myself. What I mean is training to the point of making myself really uncomfortable. For example: when I swim it will mean not just lap swimming, but will also include sprints on the clock, and not slowing down 2 strokes out before touching the wall. It will mean lifting weights that make my muscles sore the next day. It will mean keeping records of all my physical fitness activities to be sure I'm getting faster and stronger. It will mean accomplishing a goal each time I work out and getting that goal no matter what. It's hard to physically train by myself because there is no one there to push me. I'm going to have to learn how to push myself. I need to get comfortable making myself uncomforable.

Why? I want to be able to attack when necessary. Training to the pain, making myself uncomfortable, and practicing goal achievement, will allow me to take those skills to the playing field. It will allow me to develop a competitive spirit instead of a participatory one.

[Coach]

My college wrestling coach had a theme. Fatigue is our friend and Pain is our companion. He was a believer and it sure did work.

[Calamity Jane]

My college wrestling coach had a theme. Fatigue is our friend and Pain is our companion. He was a believer and it sure did work.

I know you know what I'm talking about. You've coached many a team to the pain. The hard part for me will be pushing myself to it. Not many people can. I might have to look up my old personal trainer and get some tips.

I was just cleaning out my shooting journal and I ran across this quote:

"A winner is someone who is just as concerned about who they become as to what they accomplish"

Lanny Bassham

That quote will come into play as I continue to define what winning means to me.

[XRe]

It does take a tough mind to go to battle like an ultra-endurance runner, or an Ironman triathlete, and just laugh in the face of discomfort, pain, and fear, and keep pushing. Talk about will to just even finish, much less conquer!

I find it helps me to separate the terms pain and discomfort in my mind - while they appear similar, pain can have very real consequences, and I've found that I should always at least pay attention to it enough to determine if its an issue or not. I've also had to learn that there are different flavors/shades of discomfort... some of them can seem painful I was apparently blessed with a high tolerance for pain - not bragging, just kind of how it is... By the time something bugs me, the docs I've talked to tell me that I should be a lot more affected by it. So, by the time I really start feeling like something is painful (as opposed to really uncomfortable), I might have already been injured... so I have to be careful of over training and such, and the separation of terms helps me with that internally. For whatever that's worth.

At some point, we may have to "man up" (sorry for the term ), and play in pain, or injured, or something. Certain events may be worth it - most (like local matches, and some smaller matches) aren't, as the consequences and setbacks can mean losing a bigger goal.

Other than that - push envelopes, expand boundaries. When that voice in your head tells you you've done enough work and you can back off before you finish, tell it to STFU (pardon my French), and stuff the rest of your performance down its throat. Imagine what'll happen the next time you go to shoot, and you're faced with that feeling of discomfort??

Jane, knowing your competitive nature, you might seek out a class or training situation where there's some friendly (but healthy) "bragging rights" type of atmosphere. Its making a difference for me in terms of how I attack a work out... whole new flavor of pushing through self imposed limits...

[Calamity Jane]

8 1/2 weeks

It's been around 8 weeks since I touched a gun. Today I went to the last match of the season and it felt so good. It's time to face the fact that this love...this addiction....is not going to go away. I love this sport. It's in my heart and it's not going to go away. I love it.

With that said all the usual stuff happened today that one would expect for not having shot in 8 weeks. I had trouble finding the dot on ElPrez on the draw and after the reload...I pulled off an exiting target and got a miss...stuff like that....but it FELT so good to shoot.

I was experimenting a little with my "point of attitude" or what I call arousal. Anyway, I tried jumping and imaginary rope (while holding my gun and mags..and keeping my back to the crowd of guys ) right before my run. I kept my mind clear, calm, and quiet but brought my heart rate up by jumping. Oh MY GOSH!!! That felt AWESOME. It was Yoga like. My body and mind were relaxed, but my heart was pumping hard....way cool sensation. I don't know if that is the formula for my best performance but I do know I like the way it made me feel.

I had a very enjoyable day at the range today. I felt the joy and the love. It was also good to see my friends again. I can face Monday morning remembering how I felt today.

[flyingchange]

I was experimenting a little with my "point of attitude" or what I call arousal. Anyway, I tried jumping and imaginary rope (while holding my gun and mags..and keeping my back to the crowd of guys ) right before my run. I kept my mind clear, calm, and quiet but brought my heart rate up by jumping. Oh MY GOSH!!! That felt AWESOME. It was Yoga like. My body and mind were relaxed, but my heart was pumping hard....way cool sensation. I don't know if that is the formula for my best performance but I do know I like the way it made me feel.

I do this too! Gets the blood flowing and gets rid of any feelings of anxiety or dread. It makes me feel happy and excited going into the stage, which is where I perform my best. Plus sometimes people laugh at me when they see me hopping around, and laughing is fun, too.