38supPat Posted December 1, 2006 Share Posted December 1, 2006 Take off, eh! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
half inch groups Posted December 4, 2006 Share Posted December 4, 2006 The jerk: Steve martin playing Navin R. jr. "I was born a poor black child" "lord loves a working man, dont trust whitey, see a doctor and get rid of it" "Johnson.... Navin, R...... Sounds like a typical jack ass" Navin: these cans are defective! Mr. Hartunian: We dont have defective cans! We got a defective person out there! Navin: He Hates these cans! stay away from the cans! Mr Hartunian: He doesnt want to put holes in the cans he wants to put holes in you! "Dear mom and dad, enclosed is 2 dollars. Next week I might send more money as I may have some extra work.. Patty promised me a blow job. P.S is Gramma still farting?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Craiger Posted December 7, 2006 Share Posted December 7, 2006 Bounty Hunter: "You're wanted, Wales." Josey Wales: "Reckon I'm right popular. You a bounty hunter?" Bounty Hunter: "A man's got to do something for a living these days." Josey Wales: " Dyin' ain't much of a living, boy." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jasmap Posted December 7, 2006 Share Posted December 7, 2006 Mongol: What is best in life? Conan: To crush your enemy. To see them driven before you. To hear the lamentations of the women. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
h4444 Posted December 7, 2006 Share Posted December 7, 2006 Bounty Hunter: "You're wanted, Wales." Josey Wales: "Reckon I'm right popular. You a bounty hunter?" Bounty Hunter: "A man's got to do something for a living these days." Josey Wales: " Dyin' ain't much of a living, boy." Great flick, I don't remember it exactly, but there was a scene with an old Indian he was travelin' with it goes somethin' like: Wales: Everybody I take a likin' to ends up dyin'. Indian: It seems those you don't like end up dyin' too....... Something like that anyway,,,,,, Another Eastwood classic,,,,,Unforgiven,,,,,, Little Bill: You just shot an unarmed man. Will Munny:He should have armed himself if he's gonna decorate his saloon with my friend. Again, Unforgiven: Will Munny: All right, I'm coming out. Any man I see out there, I'm gonna shoot him. Any sumbitch takes a shot at me, I'm not only gonna kill him, but I'm gonna kill his wife, all his friends, and burn his damn house down. You better bury Ned right! Better not go cuttin' up, nor otherwise harm no whores. Or I'll come back and kill every one of you sons-o-bitches. By the end of the movie, that was one vicious/mean character. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris Keen Posted December 7, 2006 Share Posted December 7, 2006 You can do it ................ you can do it all night long ! Water sucks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
outerlimits Posted December 26, 2006 Share Posted December 26, 2006 Clueless: father to daughter's boyfriend- "Anything happens to my daughter, I got a .45 and shovel. I doubt anybody would miss you". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
carinab Posted December 26, 2006 Share Posted December 26, 2006 I finally saw Borat last night with my husband... Borat: "I want ta have a car that attract woman with a shave down below" Car Dealer: "Well, That will be a Corvette." My hubby wouldn't fess up though if his corvette has the magnet installed or not. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shawn Knight Posted December 26, 2006 Share Posted December 26, 2006 I finally saw Borat last night with my husband...Borat: "I want ta have a car that attract woman with a shave down below" Car Dealer: "Well, That will be a Corvette." My hubby wouldn't fess up though if his corvette has the magnet installed or not. I think it comes standard! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dsb45acp Posted January 14, 2007 Share Posted January 14, 2007 The Last Boy Scout: Mr. Milo: "I want to hear you scream in pain." Bruce Willis: "Play some rap music." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
half inch groups Posted January 14, 2007 Share Posted January 14, 2007 I'm having an old friend for dinner! "it rubs the lotion on the skin and puts in in the basket!" "repeat" It rubs the lotion on its skin, ot it get the hose again! PREEECCCIIIOOUUSS! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shawn Knight Posted January 14, 2007 Share Posted January 14, 2007 The Last Boy Scout: Mr. Milo: "I want to hear you scream in pain." Bruce Willis: "Play some rap music." "Was that a bomb?" "Either that or a hell of a factory recall!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sslav Posted January 30, 2007 Share Posted January 30, 2007 (edited) Vinny: What the f*#k do you mean, replicas? Sol: They look the shit, don't they? And nobody is gonna argue. And I've got some extra loud blanks, just in case. Vinny: In... Oh, in case we have to deafen them to death? Bullet Tooth Tony: So, you are obviously the big dick. The men on the side of ya are your balls. There are two types of balls. There are big brave balls, and there are little mincey f####t balls. Vinny: These are your last words, so make them a prayer. Bullet Tooth Tony: Now, dicks have drive and clarity of vision, but they are not clever. They smell p###y and they want a piece of the action. And you thought you smelled some good old p###y, and have brought your two small mincey f####t balls along for a good old time. But you've got your parties mangled up. There's no p###y here, just those that'll make you wish you were born a woman. Like a prick, you are having second thoughts. You are shrinking, and your two little balls are shrinking with you. And the fact that you've got "Replica" written down the side of your gun... [Zoom in on the side of Sol's gun, which indeed has "REPLICA" etched on the side; zoom out, as they sneak peeks at the sides of their guns] Bullet Tooth Tony: And the fact that I've got "Desert Eagle point five O"... [Draws his gun and puts it on the table] Bullet Tooth Tony: Written down the side of mine... [They look, zoom in on the side of his gun, which indeed has "DESERT EAGLE .50" etched on the side] Bullet Tooth Tony: Should precipitate your balls into shrinking, along with your presence. Now... F$$k off! Brick Top: You're always gonna have problems lifting a body in one piece. Apparently the best thing to do is cut up a corpse into six pieces and pile it all together. Sol: Would someone mind telling me, who are you? Brick Top: And when you got your six pieces, you gotta get rid of them, because it's no good leaving it in the deep freeze for your mum to discover, now is it? Then I hear the best thing to do is feed them to pigs. You got to starve the pigs for a few days, then the sight of a chopped-up body will look like curry to a pisshead. You gotta shave the heads of your victims, and pull the teeth out for the sake of the piggies' digestion. You could do this afterwards, of course, but you don't want to go sievin' through pig s##t, now do you? They will go through bone like butter. You need at least sixteen pigs to finish the job in one sitting, so be wary of any man who keeps a pig farm. They will go through a body that weighs 200 pounds in about eight minutes. That means that a single pig can consume two pounds of uncooked flesh every minute. Hence the expression, "as greedy as a pig". Tommy: Are you sayin' I can't shoot? Turkish: No Tommy, I'm not saying you can't shoot. I know you can't shoot. I'm saying that six-pound piece of s##t stuck in your trousers would do more damage if you fed it to him. [Tony empties his gun through the wall, hitting both Boris and Tyrone. He comes in, reloading] Bullet Tooth Tony: What's Boris doing here? Boris, what are you doing here? Boris 'The Blade' Yurinov: F$$k you! [Tony shoots him twice, then turns to Tyrone] Bullet Tooth Tony: Where's the case? Boris 'The Blade' Yurinov: Uhhh, you piece of crap... Bullet Tooth Tony: Don't talk the piss, Boris. Boris 'The Blade' Yurinov: [reaching for his gun] I show you... [Tony shoots him four more times] Boris 'The Blade' Yurinov: F$$k you! [a seventh time] Boris 'The Blade' Yurinov: Almost had it... Bullet Tooth Tony: For f$$k's sake... [Tony takes careful aim and fires an eighth shot. Sound of Boris finally collapsing] [standing over Franky's body] Bad Boy Lincoln: What has he got a tea cozy on his head for? Sol: [sarcastic] To keep his head warm. Bad Boy Lincoln: Well, what's the matter with him? Vinny: He's been shot in the face, Lincoln. I thought that would be obvious. Boris 'The Blade' Yurinov: [referring to Tommy's gun] Heavy is good, heavy is reliable. If it doesn't work you can always hit them with it. Edited January 30, 2007 by sslav Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
folsoml Posted January 30, 2007 Share Posted January 30, 2007 Judge Chamberlain Haller: Mr. Gambini, didn't I tell you that the next time you appear in my court that you dress appropriately? Vinny Gambini: You were serious about that? Vinny Gambini: How could it take you five minutes to cook your grits when it takes the entire grit-eating world 20 minutes? Mr. Tipton: Um... I'm a fast cook, I guess. Vinny Gambini: [across beside the jury] What? I'm sorry I was over there. Did you just say you were a fast cook? Are we to believe that boiling water soaks into a grit faster in your kitchen than any place on the face of the earth? Mr. Tipton: I don't know. Vinny Gambini: Perhaps the laws of physics cease to exist on your stove. Were these magic grits? Did you buy them from the same guy who sold Jack his beanstalk beans? Vinny Gambini: I bought a suit. You seen it. Now it's covered in mud. This town doesn't have a one hour cleaner so I had to buy a new suit, except the only store you could buy a new suit in has got the flu. Got that? The whole store got the flu so I had to get this in a second hand store. So it's either wear the leather jacket which I know you hate, or this. So I wore this ridiculous thing for you. Judge Chamberlain Haller: I don't like your attitude. Vinny Gambini: So what else is new? Judge Chamberlain Haller: I'm holding you in contempt of court. Vinny Gambini: [to Bill] Now there's a f*#king surprise. Judge Chamberlain Haller: What did you say? What did you just say? Vinny Gambini: Huh? What did I say? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thomas Moore Posted January 30, 2007 Share Posted January 30, 2007 "Get yer dick beaters off my stuff" Smokin' Aces Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sslav Posted January 30, 2007 Share Posted January 30, 2007 (edited) A few quick ones: Conspiracy Theory -- Jerry Fletcher: To be normal, to drink Coca-Cola and eat Kentucky Fried Chicken is to be in a conspiracy against yourself. Remo Williams Chiun: Breathe out... slowly... do not gulp. If you do not breathe correctly, you do not move correctly. Pitiful. I can see the deadly hamburger has done its evil work. Tank Girl -- Tank Girl: You gotta think about it like the first time you got laid. You gotta go: "Daddy, are you sure this is right?" Serenity -- Capt. Malcolm Reynolds: [on the ship's intercom] This is the captain. We have a little problem with our entry sequence, so we may experience some slight turbulence and then - explode. Last Action Hero Jack Slater: Sir, are you a henchman? Benedict: No, I only go as far as lackey. Real Men -- Bob: They're gonna shoot at us, aren't they? Nick: Probably, Bob. It's what they brought the guns for. Con Air -- Garland Greene: What if I told you insane was working fifty hours a week in some office for fifty years at the end of which they tell you to piss off; ending up in some retirement village hoping to die before suffering the indignity of trying to make it to the toilet on time? Wouldn't you consider that to be insane? Edited January 30, 2007 by sslav Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TMC Posted February 7, 2007 Share Posted February 7, 2007 from Real GeniusChris Knight: Have you ever seen a body like this before in your life? David Decker: She happens to be my daughter. Chris Knight: Oh. Then I guess you have. Mitch: You know, um, something strange happened to me this morning... Chris Knight: Was it a dream where you see yourself standing in sort of sun-god robes on a pyramid, with a thousand naked women screaming and throwing little pickles at you? Mitch: No... Chris Knight: Why am I the only one who has that dream? Chris Knight: So, if there's anything I can do for you, or, more to the point, to you, you just let me know. Susan: Can you hammer a six-inch spike through a board with your penis? Chris Knight: Not right now. Susan: A girl's gotta have her standards. Don't forget while touring a college and wearing antenna's in his head an administrator asks Chris, "why do you wear those things on your head?" Chris "because if I wear them anywhere else they chafe” Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BBunin Posted February 7, 2007 Share Posted February 7, 2007 (edited) Tank Girl --Tank Girl: You gotta think about it like the first time you got laid. You gotta go: "Daddy, are you sure this is right?" I'm going to need a microscope and some tweezers for this. Well, it's been swell, but the swelling's gone down now and ........ I vote for Crumpets and Tea. Serenity --Capt. Malcolm Reynolds: [on the ship's intercom] This is the captain. We have a little problem with our entry sequence, so we may experience some slight turbulence and then - explode. Wash: Yeah well, if she doesn't give us some extra flow from the engine room to offset the burn-through, this landing is going to get pretty interesting. Mal: Define interesting! Wash: [deadpan] "Oh god, oh god, we're all gonna die"? Jayne trying to swap Vera, his gun, for Saffron..... And the best one.... I swallowed a bug. Edited February 7, 2007 by BBunin Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shawn Knight Posted February 7, 2007 Share Posted February 7, 2007 Tank Girl: Look, if you want to torture me, spank me, lick me, do it. But if this poetry sh!t continues just shoot me now please. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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