EricW Posted January 14, 2005 Share Posted January 14, 2005 I'm sick as hell of the weather reports any more. Me and my Montanan freshman roomate could drink Yukon Jack, throw darts, and predict weather better than the losers doing it now. The predictions are so far off it isn't even funny. We're in the middle of a Nuclear Winter Wooly Mammoth Attack Alert. It's supposed to be 5 or 10 below right now. The National Guard just drove through the neighborhood passing out handwarmers and 458 Weatherbys. Of course, it's actually a fairly balmy 20F outside. I foolishly believed that they may actually be able to quasi-accurately model a moving arctic airmass and wasted my time running extension cords and moving trucks inside so the stupid blocks wouldn't freeze. The mammoths have yet to show. What the hell was *I* thinking? They're wrong now, just like they're always totally wrong anymore. We should stop piddling billions away on supercomputers, satellites, radar, overpaid eggheads, and plastic-filled weatherbabes, because none of it's working for sh*t. They're all a bunch of idiots. Send the jiggle chicks back to the strip joint where they belong and give us all our money back. I can do a better job reading a barometer and looking out the damn window. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kimel Posted January 14, 2005 Share Posted January 14, 2005 And just this once I am kinda glad that they aren't that accurate. But once the cloud cover burns off the temp will plumment. What other job can you have were you can be CONSISTENTLY wrong and still pick up your paycheck? Ohhh...and the NG gave me a choice so I took the quad .50's and mounted them in the back of my Toyota. I'll use the Subaru as an ammo tender. But they were out of hand warmers so gave me a case of scotch instead. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Flexmoney Posted January 14, 2005 Share Posted January 14, 2005 Anybody seen the car ad...they show a guy driving thru all the bad weather...showing everybody else having a bad time of it...then the guy starts to go into his building for work...and he gets whacked with snowballs... then you see his picture on a poster on the bus stop (or something)...he is the weatherman Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sfinney Posted January 14, 2005 Share Posted January 14, 2005 Don't forget that bad weather forecast = ratings. TV weather seems to lean to the over sensationlized side when it comes to predicting wx, and people tune in to get the gory details..... coincidence? I think not. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JFlowers Posted January 14, 2005 Share Posted January 14, 2005 Its a conspiracy between the owners of the news media and the owners of the bread and milk companies!!!!!! By forecasting horrible weather, the TV ratings go up and the sales of bread and milk go up. Its a conspiracy I tell you!!!! Sorry, I will go take my medicine now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scooter Posted January 14, 2005 Share Posted January 14, 2005 One of the local radio station morning show decided to predict their own weather. Their method is with a dart board. We were suppose to get lava earlier this week which is pretty much the same as the big storm that was suppose to have come in. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SiG Lady Posted January 14, 2005 Share Posted January 14, 2005 Yes, the TV ad about the weatherman is good. The "UIW"... Universally Incorrect Weatherperson. "Lava"...! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SmittyFL Posted January 14, 2005 Share Posted January 14, 2005 My favorite is driving in a thunderstorm and listening to the hourly forecast on the radio that says 60% chance of rain. "No, retard, it's 100%, look out the F'ing window!!" My dad used to say it all went to hell when they started using percentages. Now when they say it's going to be a beautiful day with only a 10% chance of rain and it rains, they say "see, that's the 10% I told you about." Losers........all losers!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ima45dv8 Posted January 14, 2005 Share Posted January 14, 2005 I could do as well with one of Granny's "weather beetles". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
warpspeed Posted January 14, 2005 Share Posted January 14, 2005 The predictions are so far off it isn't even funny. We're in the middle of a Nuclear Winter Wooly Mammoth Attack Alert. It's supposed to be 5 or 10 below right now. The National Guard just drove through the neighborhood passing out handwarmers and 458 Weatherbys. Weatherby doesn't make a 458, it's a 460 Perhaps you would not mind the weather person so much if you had mine : Jackie Johnson Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
diehli Posted January 14, 2005 Share Posted January 14, 2005 Perhaps you would not mind the weather person so much if you had mine : Jackie Johnson Ditto for Jillian Barberie and Rachel Boesing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EricW Posted January 14, 2005 Author Share Posted January 14, 2005 Perhaps you would not mind the weather person so much if you had mine : Jackie Johnson Oh she's great. Got a lap dance from her when we were both in college. Just put up the brass pole in front of the weather map and spare me the innuendo. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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