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The Hospital


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Anyone who has ever had a loved one in the hospital will enjoy this:

A woman called a local hospital. "Hello. Could you connect me to the person who gives

information about patients. I'd like to find out if a patient is getting better, doing as expected, or getting worse."

The voice on the other end said, "What is the patient's name and room number?"

"Sarah Finkel, room 302."

"I'll connect you with the nursing station."

"3-A Nursing Station. How can I help You?"

"I'd like to know the condition of Sarah Finkel in room 302."

"Just a moment. Let me look at her records. Mrs. Finkel is doing very well.

In fact, she's had two full meals, her blood pressure is fine, to be taken off the heart monitor in a couple of hours

and, if she continues this improvement, Dr. Cohen is going to send her home Tuesday at noon."

The woman said, "What a relief! Oh, that's fantastic... that's wonderful news!"

The nurse said, "From your enthusiasm, I take it you are a close family member or a very close friend!"

"Neither! I'm Sarah Finkel in 302! Nobody here tells me s---."

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I'll be sure to remember THIS trick next time I'm "in"...... (hopefully not too soon, of course).

Good Luck - current law prohibits release of personal information about patients. Technically, staff aren't even allowed to acknowlege that the patient is even there if thay cannot identify the caller as someone entitled to the info.

The rules to protect confidentiality are overly protective on occasion. Patient charts in my office that are put into exam room door slots for the patient inside are supposed to be turned face in so that nobody can read the names (I kid you not). Like nobody sees each other in the waiting room...

Sorry, I should rant this in the Hate Forum... ;)

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