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Redneck Joke

Merlin Orr

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One Sunday morning William burst into the living room and said, "Dad! Mom! I have some great news for you! I am getting married to the most beautiful girl in town. She lives a block away and her name is Susan.

After dinner, William's dad took him aside. "Son, I have to talk with you. Your mother and I have been married 30 years. She's a wonderful wife but she has never offered much excitement in the bedroom, so I used to fool around with women a lot. Susan is actually your half-sister, and I'm afraid you can't marry her."

William was heartbroken. After eight months he eventually started dating girls again. A year later he came home and very proudly announced, "Diane said yes! We're getting married in June."

Again his father insisted on another private conversation and broke the sad news. "Diane is your half-sister too, William. I'm awfully sorry about this."

William was furious! He finally decided to go to his mother with the news. "Dad has done so much harm. I guess I'm never going to get married, " he complained. "Every time I fall in love, Dad tells me the girl is my half-sister."

His mother just shook her head. "Don't pay any attention to what he says, dear. He's not really your father."

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  • 2 weeks later...

A young man came home very happy and told his father he had met the girl of his dreams. His father asked who she was, and his son told him. The man then told his son he would have to stop dating her because he had an affair with the girl's mother and so he couldn't be sure the girl was not his daughter.

The son was broken hearted because he really loved her. later that day, his mother asked her son what was wrong and he explained it all to her.

She smiled and told him to go ahead and date the girl.

The son asked, "But, what if the girl is Dad's daughter?"

"No problem. " the mother replied. "He's not really your father."

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