Duct Tape

[diehli]

This universal fixit material is available in many flavors for a variety of applications. Best to get the model specific type. Although manufacturing costs are pretty much the same for each brand, about $0.10/roll, retail price varies according to marque-specificity:

Yamaha, blue--always leaders in quirky innovation, their tape is at the leading edge of technology and design using time-tested engineering. $2.25/roll.

Suzuki, yellow--a bit chintzy and prone to undiagnosable performance issues, because they share development costs with Kawasaki, they nevertheless make a competitive product to a price point. $1.99/roll

Kawasaki, green--A very performance oriented tape forgoing any semblance of finesse for brute strength. If it wasn't for the day-glo green color, everyone would use it. $1.98/roll

Honda, red--Stealing the best ideas of others, and overengineering to a fault, their conservative, technically superior tape is oddly not very exciting. It does not exceed any of the other tapes in any one performance category, yet oddly wins magazine comparisons, surely not due to their huge advertising budget. Their mystique means that they can charge $2.99/roll and get away with it.

Ducati, red--Outsourced to the same manufacturer as Honda's tape, you pay $10.95/roll because the packaging has "Ducati" plastered all over it. They take pride in having invented it--Duc Tape--although their native manufacturing facilities eventually closed after a dozen rounds of buy-outs and governemnt bail-outs.

Harley-Davidson, black or orange--Outsourced to a pacific rim manufactuer but designed in the good ol' US of A, patriotism bears a price. $9.99 for Factory endorsed black, or $19.95 for the Screamin' Eagle orange upgrade. They also sell Buell tape in blue or white, but they don't like to admit it.

Triumph, british racing green--This classic stuff is waterproof to a fault, although known to fail for no good reason. The more modern version is as boring as its Japanese rivals. Aspiring to euro-status, this tape will set you back $4.99.

BMW, grey--"We make it our way and you will like it, swine!" Basic, boring grey color is accentuated by weighing way too much. Engineering gimmicks aside, this is a stout tape that will last a lifetime. Price? A teutonic $14.95

[IPSCDRL]

Duct tape is like The Force.

It has a dark side and a light side...

And it holds the universe together.

Right Darth?

[Scooter]

If you can't duct it, f*ck it.