SiG Lady Posted May 2, 2004 Share Posted May 2, 2004 ROMANCE MATHEMATICS Smart man + smart woman = romance Smart man + dumb woman = affair Dumb man + smart woman = marriage Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy OFFICE ARITHMETIC Smart boss + smart employee = profit Smart boss + dumb employee = production Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime SHOPPING MATH A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs. A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need. GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife. A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man. HAPPINESS To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little. To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all. LONGEVITY Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot more willing to die. PROPENSITY TO CHANGE A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't. A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does. DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument. HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED People come up to you at weddings, poke you in the ribs and cackle, "You're next." Stop them by going up to them at funerals and cackling the same thing to them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jeeper Posted May 3, 2004 Share Posted May 3, 2004 HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED People come up to you at weddings, poke you in the ribs and cackle, "You're next." Stop them by going up to them at funerals and cackling the same thing to them ROTFLMAO The whole thing was good but the last line killed me!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
George Posted May 3, 2004 Share Posted May 3, 2004 Thank You, I needed that! I will be waiting for the right time to let my wife see it... -- Regards, Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dajarrel Posted May 3, 2004 Share Posted May 3, 2004 My wife and I have a rule that lets me have the last words in any discussion. They are: "Yes Dear" As long as I remember the rules, all is well! dj Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gm iprod Posted May 3, 2004 Share Posted May 3, 2004 As above Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kevin c Posted May 4, 2004 Share Posted May 4, 2004 As above, which will work for any discussion that did not start with my saying, "I'm sorry honey, did you say something?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now