IMHO if your bullet has a flat point, then you need to use a flat-tipped seating stem. If you don't, two things will happen: 1) you will get inconsistent OALs; 2) the bullet will tip, causing it to shave.
The Hornady Custom Grade 9mm seating die should include a round stem and a flat stem; mine did, and it works like a champ if, and only if, you use the right stem.
Edited to clarify: I do not use the 3-die set; I did but got tired of mashing/gouging my coated/plated bullets during the seating operation. I use the individually sold Custom Grade Seater Die and the individually sold Custom Grade Taper Crimp Die.