GrumpyOne Posted July 6, 2017 Share Posted July 6, 2017 My dog got his tail cut off and I had to sell him wholesale cause I couldn't retail him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JKSNIPER Posted August 15, 2017 Share Posted August 15, 2017 I was driving home and day dreaming and didn't realize that traffic had stopped. I looked up but couldn't stop in time and hit the car in front of me. I pulled over behind the car I'd hit and got out and was looking at the damage to the very nice cadillac I'd hit and wondering how I'd pay for the damage when the driver of the caddy walked up. He was a dwarf. He says very loud and angrily " I'm NOT happy!" SO I said "Well then...which one are you?" And that officer is how the fight started. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hi-Power Jack Posted August 15, 2017 Share Posted August 15, 2017 He was, obviously, Grumpy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rfwobbly Posted October 24, 2017 Share Posted October 24, 2017 On 11/1/2016 at 9:27 PM, bubbadoc said: What do you call a cow with 2 legs? Lean beef what do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef Where does Dragon milk come from ? Cows with no legs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DukeEB Posted October 24, 2017 Share Posted October 24, 2017 Before your criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you do criticize them, you're a mile away and have their shoes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WaJim Posted November 10, 2017 Share Posted November 10, 2017 Off Southpark last night.... Indian (Native American) Joke: So this Bear walks into a bar and asks the Deer bartender, "Barkeep can I get....................................................................................................................................................................................................................................A Beer?" The Deer barkeep says, "Sure Buddy, but whats with the big Paws (pause)?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
natec Posted May 24, 2018 Share Posted May 24, 2018 On 3/17/2016 at 3:32 PM, Idahoan said: what do you call a deer with no eyes? I-have-no-idear What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs? Still no idear. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DukeEB Posted June 4, 2018 Share Posted June 4, 2018 I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with, but I've been tripping all day Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miranda Posted June 4, 2018 Share Posted June 4, 2018 the new corduroy pillow cases are making headlines Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Part_time_redneck Posted June 5, 2018 Share Posted June 5, 2018 A man brings his young son to work with him one day. A nice gentleman asked the youngster " where did you get those pretty blue eyes "? Kid replies " the mailman ". Same guy and son go to work another day with a nice deer they had shot that morning. Same guy asked the kid " boy, that sure is a good looking deer. Did,you shoot that thing"? Kid - " No sir, I was holding the spotlight". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hi-Power Jack Posted June 5, 2018 Share Posted June 5, 2018 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
belus Posted June 26, 2018 Share Posted June 26, 2018 A masochist says to a sadist, "Hurt me." The sadist responds, "No." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bubbadoc Posted June 30, 2018 Share Posted June 30, 2018 What is the medical term for owning too many dogs? A roverdose Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bubbadoc Posted June 30, 2018 Share Posted June 30, 2018 OK, one more classic... I saw my dog chasing a man on a bike this morning. I didn't even know that Fido owned a bike Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steve RA Posted June 30, 2018 Share Posted June 30, 2018 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vmax606 Posted July 11, 2018 Share Posted July 11, 2018 (edited) What is the difference between beer nuts and deer nuts ? Beer nuts are $1.25 . Deer nuts are under a buck. What is brown, black and blue ? A brunette that told too many blonde jokes. . Edited July 11, 2018 by Vmax606 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
usmc1974 Posted July 11, 2018 Share Posted July 11, 2018 2 blondes settling on the park bench. 1 looks over and says to the other, I wonder which is closer? The moon or Texas? The other looks at her and says daaa hello, you can see the moon. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vmax606 Posted August 2, 2018 Share Posted August 2, 2018 2 samurais are having dinner, and a fly buzzing by. One pulled out his sword and SWIZZ / dead fly. Another fly buzzed by, the other pulled out his sword and SWIZZ / fly was still flying. * Hey, you missed. * Nah ! No more babies. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vmax606 Posted August 2, 2018 Share Posted August 2, 2018 (edited) Deleted (maybe too mature for 10 year old kid). Edited August 2, 2018 by Vmax606 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IHAVEGAS Posted August 2, 2018 Share Posted August 2, 2018 When I was born, the doctor slapped my mother. R.Dangerfield Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vmax606 Posted August 2, 2018 Share Posted August 2, 2018 A guy driving down a country road and ran over a rabbit, he pulled over and got a spray can and sprayed all over the rabbit. Suddenly the rabbit stood up and started waving, the guy threw the can on the side of the road and took off. An old man on the front porch saw everything and went to pick up the can. It says : Hair restore , permanent wave. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
usmc1974 Posted August 2, 2018 Share Posted August 2, 2018 2 hours ago, Vmax606 said: A guy driving down a country road and ran over a rabbit, he pulled over and got a spray can and sprayed all over the rabbit. Suddenly the rabbit stood up and started waving, the guy threw the can on the side of the road and took off. An old man on the front porch saw everything and went to pick up the can. It says : Hair restore , permanent wave. Lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dranoel Posted August 6, 2018 Share Posted August 6, 2018 (edited) What's black and white and yellow and won't fit through a revolving door? A Nun with a canoe on her head. (better?) Edited August 7, 2018 by Dranoel Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hi-Power Jack Posted August 6, 2018 Share Posted August 6, 2018 53 minutes ago, Dranoel said: A Nun with a spear through her head. Getting a little close to the line with that joke. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dranoel Posted August 7, 2018 Share Posted August 7, 2018 On 8/6/2018 at 6:58 AM, Hi-Power Jack said: Getting a little close to the line with that joke. Sorry. Wasn't meant to be political or anti religious. Just found it funny picturing that trying get through a revolving door. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now