EddyB Posted April 19, 2014 Share Posted April 19, 2014 A soldier survived mustard gas in battle, and then pepper spray by the police, he is now a seasoned veteran. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EddyB Posted April 19, 2014 Author Share Posted April 19, 2014 Never trust an atom, they make up everything. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EddyB Posted April 19, 2014 Author Share Posted April 19, 2014 A dyslexic man walk into a Bra......... Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EddyB Posted April 19, 2014 Author Share Posted April 19, 2014 I hate Russian dolls.....so full of themselves Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bk94 Posted April 28, 2014 Share Posted April 28, 2014 How do you make a tissue dance? But a little boogie in it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bk94 Posted April 28, 2014 Share Posted April 28, 2014 What did the 0 say to the 8... Nice belt Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MarkCO Posted April 28, 2014 Share Posted April 28, 2014 The red line... What is red, green and swirls? Frog in a blender. What is red, gray and bad for your teeth? A brick wall. What happens when the red ship crashed into the blue ship? The crews were marooned. Why did the tomato turn red? He saw the salad dressing. What is black and white and red all over? A Panda with a sunburn. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
george76904 Posted May 1, 2014 Share Posted May 1, 2014 Q: Did you hear about the dyslexic, agnostic insomniac? A: He stayed up all night wondering if there was a dog... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GrumpyOne Posted May 1, 2014 Share Posted May 1, 2014 Two IDPA shooters walk into a building...You'd have thought one of them would have seen it... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
steviesterno Posted May 1, 2014 Share Posted May 1, 2014 how many IDPA shooters does it take to paint a house? Depends how hard you throw them How do you get 4 IDPA shooters into a bucket? A blender. How do you get them out again? Tortilla chips Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GrumpyOne Posted May 9, 2014 Share Posted May 9, 2014 A pirate walks into a bar with a ships wheel stuck down his pants....Bartender says "Hey! You know you have a ships wheel stuffed down your pants?" "Arrgh!" Says the pirate "It drives me nuts!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ethanolguy Posted May 30, 2014 Share Posted May 30, 2014 my wife asked me, "If I die, will you remarry" I said probably. She then asked if my new wife would use her good china, and I said probably. She then asked if she would wear her clothes and I said, if they fit I don't see why not. She then asked " will she use my trap gun?" I said "she can't honey, she is left handed" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SandW745 Posted June 9, 2014 Share Posted June 9, 2014 (edited) my wife asked me, "If I die, will you remarry" I said probably. She then asked if my new wife would use her good china, and I said probably. She then asked if she would wear her clothes and I said, if they fit I don't see why not. She then asked " will she use my trap gun?" I said "she can't honey, she is left handed" Oops! "And that's when the fight started"! Edited June 9, 2014 by SandW745 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kevin c Posted June 12, 2014 Share Posted June 12, 2014 No, that's when she said, "When you die, I will remarry, and I'm a fixin' for a hitchin' soon..." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zooligan Posted June 28, 2014 Share Posted June 28, 2014 From my 9-year old: Why did the math book get glasses? It had problems with division! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Truegent2004 Posted July 3, 2014 Share Posted July 3, 2014 A horse walks into a bar.......the bartender says, "Hey, why the long face?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dranoel Posted July 11, 2014 Share Posted July 11, 2014 Jesse Jackson, Hillary Clinton and the Pope walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of a joke?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dranoel Posted July 11, 2014 Share Posted July 11, 2014 A roman walks into a bar and orders a Martinus. The bartender say, "You mean a Martini?" The roman says, "If I wanted a double, I'd have asked for it." A roman walks into a bar, holds up two fingers and says, "Five beers, please." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gm iprod Posted July 17, 2014 Share Posted July 17, 2014 Baby Seal walks into a Club. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mjohn Posted July 18, 2014 Share Posted July 18, 2014 A roman walks into a bar and orders a Martinus. The bartender say, "You mean a Martini?" The roman says, "If I wanted a double, I'd have asked for it." A roman walks into a bar, holds up two fingers and says, "Five beers, please." Great one!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr. Phil Posted July 18, 2014 Share Posted July 18, 2014 My wife just got elected president of her ladie's group. It's called D.A.M. (Mothers Against Dyslexia) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dranoel Posted July 25, 2014 Share Posted July 25, 2014 I put my root beer in a square cup. Now it's just beer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sarge Posted July 25, 2014 Share Posted July 25, 2014 Made one up myself tonight and damned if the wife didn't think it was funny! We went shopping for Dill so she can do some canning this weekend. I asked her what we would use to buy the Dill. Dill dough! She told me I was childish so it must have been good right?? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dranoel Posted July 25, 2014 Share Posted July 25, 2014 You're a good man, Sarge. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steve RA Posted July 25, 2014 Share Posted July 25, 2014 Cute ! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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