I'm fairly new to reloading, so bear that in mind. This is information I've gained from doing exactly what you're doing....asking around on the net. Plus a few things I've learned on my own.....
AFAIK if you load Rainiers too hot the plating will come off. This may be the source of what you've seen regarding separation.
These are not jacketed bullets...they're plated, and Rainier tells you to use the load data for equivalent lead bullets.
http://www.rainierballistics.com/loaddata.htm
I've read in many places that you should stick to midrange loads at most. 1200, 1300 seems WAY hot for a plated bullet to me, but I'm a relative newbie.
I don't know about flat points, but for 124 RNs I'm using 4.0 of HP-38 (which is identical to 231...compare published data to confirm this) with an OAL of 1.125. The OAL for flat points will probably be less because of the different shape. Here's why I say that:
I learned a few things about OAL from loading cast lead bullets. The first batch of lead RNs I used had a shoulder on them, which made figuring out the seating depth easy...just seat so the edge of the shoulder shows, and you're done. That turned out to be 1.130.
But the second batch had no shoulder and were a different shape...more rounded, less pointed, so the parallel sides of the bullet extended farther forward on the bullet body. Loading these to 1.130, I was having feed and stuck cartridge problems. Turns out the bullet was engaging the rifling before the cartridge was fully seated. In some cases the slide could force the bullet in and it'd work but sometimes they wouldn't feed fully....AND they'd get stuck in the barrel. The depth that finally worked with these bullets was all the way down at 1.09, and even at that, one of my pistols still has difficulty with it (normal variation in chamber dimension).
If you look at the bullet profiles on the Rainier website you'll see that your FPs have sides that extend much farther forward than those on the RNs. This is why I speculate that you may have to have a shorter OAL.
If you can't find any data at all for this bullet shape in lead, then I'd suggest starting with a case length that is clearly too long and checking the fit in your gun's barrel by dropping the round into the chamber. It won't drop in all the way initially. Then gradually reduce the OAL until it plunks into place easily. That will be the maximum possible length for your gun and that bullet. As long as you're over SAAMI minimum, you ought to be okay... but....
Another thing I've heard is that you have to be careful with 9mm, especially when loading it hot, to avoid seating too deeply. The case volume is so small that pressures will go WAY up if you seat a little bit too deep. In other words, there isn't much margin for error in a case that small.
y'all be careful out there....